{"title":"High Five Line","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the snowflakes melt faster than their feelings and the roasts land harder than a felled tree, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003eHigh5 Line\u003c\/strong\u003e— shirts packed with pure, unfiltered naught that’ll trigger the sensitive, spark the savage, and leave the rest clutching pearls while you grin like a wolf.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHigh5 Line\u003c\/strong\u003e This ain’t a collection for the faint-hearted. \u003cstrong\u003eHigh5\u003c\/strong\u003e is a hand-picked gut-punches designed to offend the right people, make the wrong people rage-quit, and remind everyone else why we don’t water down the truth. Every tee in this drop slings raw humor, zero remorse, and maximum “fuck around and find out” energy:\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003eSoft Airlume cotton that breathes when you’re owning the room, retail fit that shows off the attitude, ethically made so your values stay as solid as your spine, and tear-away labels so nothing scratches while you scratch the surface of polite society.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eHigh5 Line\u003c\/strong\u003e when you want to say “I don’t give a fuck” without opening your mouth—because some statements don’t need words… they need a shirt that hits like a five-finger death punch.\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"official-phucktard-club-member","title":"Oxygen Thief With a Side of Extra Stupid","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the idiots multiply faster than rabbits and the patience runs thinner than a cheap condom, High in the Pines proudly shits out the \u003cstrong\u003eHigh in the Pines PHucktarD T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a merciless, in-your-face middle finger to every drooling moron who’s ever crossed your path.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHigh in the Pines PHucktarD T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Wear this savage fuck-you flag and watch the world squirm. PHucktarD blazes across your chest like a brand burned into the forehead of every mouth-breathing dipshit who deserves it. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee is built for the ones who’ve had enough of the stupidity parade and want to advertise it loud, proud, and permanent.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Made for the ones who’ve finally snapped, the ones who see a phucktard every time they blink, and the ones who want the world to know exactly how little patience is left in the tank. Whether you’re dealing with idiots at work, idiots in traffic, idiots online, or idiots who somehow still breathe the same air as you—this soft, high-quality tee is your weapon, your armor, and your battle cry.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the High in the Pines PHucktarD T-Shirt and let every breathing moron know: we see you, we judge you, and we’re fucking done pretending otherwise. 😈\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44093152788525,"sku":"25968865837671408257","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078384676909,"sku":"12404715376791709568","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078384709677,"sku":"23886313512987943510","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44825191907373,"sku":"19280916191111896260","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44093152985133,"sku":"56869833918258844350","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078384742445,"sku":"25031656903414045653","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078384775213,"sku":"13717301830998040062","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44825191940141,"sku":"31197970408774868113","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44093153181741,"sku":"15452225915943961597","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078384807981,"sku":"20640912654468662890","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078384840749,"sku":"49697579589760901660","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44825191972909,"sku":"11405446193299800296","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44093153378349,"sku":"62334276925274087826","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078384873517,"sku":"69891470525920701891","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078384906285,"sku":"25212402462423859270","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44825192005677,"sku":"25796336386399055140","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44093153574957,"sku":"21470286150353054610","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078384939053,"sku":"28193178208832606218","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078384971821,"sku":"18419137232101413226","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825192038445,"sku":"22402207355944639334","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44093153771565,"sku":"16652966576282465762","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078385004589,"sku":"20671225457514311143","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078385037357,"sku":"33652022305715980239","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825192071213,"sku":"74333824258835421361","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/12970589152330615408_2048.jpg?v=1775842701"},{"product_id":"common-sense-less-comn-tee","title":"Rare as Fuck","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the brains are scarcer than a sober Saturday and the stupidity epidemic rages like a backwoods blaze, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eComn Sense T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a merciless gut-punch that mocks every mouth-breathing moron who thinks \"common\" sense is anything but a goddamn myth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eComn Sense T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Call out the chaos with the Comn Sense T-Shirt—a brutal, no-bullshit tee that roasts the brainless hordes with a bold \"COMN SENSE\" slap, lettin’ everyone know that real sense is so rare it’s missin’ letters just like their IQ points. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee combines savage truth-tellin’ with cozy comfort, perfect for droppin’ red pills at the bar, roastin’ the group chat, or just remindin’ the world that if they had half a brain, they’d spell it right—and shut the fuck up.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for heated arguments, casual hangs, or layering with zero fucks left. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal shade-throwin’, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with whatever middle finger you’re wearin’ today. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every roast and wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your savage truth-tellin’ with real-deal values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, lettin’ you rock the “Comn Sense” burn with zero itch and maximum smug satisfaction.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the ones who’ve had enough of the idiocy parade, the ones who see through the performative nonsense, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “common sense died and y’all killed it” without openin’ their mouth. Whether you’re at the cookout callin’ out the dumb, scrollin’ through the clown show, or just ownin’ the day with zero patience for stupidity, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ rage-quits, and remindin’ the world that some things are just too obvious to spell any other way.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Comn Sense T-Shirt and let your savage, no-bullshit spirit shine! 😈🖤\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078430978093,"sku":"33024995780110343937","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44092882354221,"sku":"29753129382845135318","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44092882419757,"sku":"11399361723296251673","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44825183485997,"sku":"12187590710686471787","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078431043629,"sku":"29910739521821097948","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44092882518061,"sku":"16830185576891122347","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44092882583597,"sku":"19861900000441070484","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44825183518765,"sku":"94503058106842434302","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078431109165,"sku":"85916710060049485521","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44092882681901,"sku":"19713490594353440350","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44092882747437,"sku":"15223395620216216957","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44825183551533,"sku":"32377812479187316967","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078431174701,"sku":"29401489730797075330","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44092882845741,"sku":"10586508988637529948","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44092882911277,"sku":"75993463861511271617","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44825183584301,"sku":"16828739636445318520","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078431240237,"sku":"10751535198858639484","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44092883009581,"sku":"16720070066733339979","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44092883075117,"sku":"22493758100907537283","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825183617069,"sku":"28257559940032919852","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078431305773,"sku":"11043065622720142599","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44092883173421,"sku":"15983605675229550223","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44092883238957,"sku":"44418440931443981562","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825183649837,"sku":"92259928127607495270","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/1405692813982179149_2048.jpg?v=1775842196"},{"product_id":"pine-pulse-wilderness-vibes-tee","title":"Where the Air’s Clean \u0026 the Vibes Are Filthy","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the air’s thick with resin and the bullshit stays downwind, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eHigh in the Pines T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a rugged, no-apologies banner that says “this is my church, my bar, my battlefield, and my middle finger to everything else.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHigh in the Pines T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Stake your claim with the High in the Pines T-Shirt—a raw, pine-soaked declaration that screams “I don’t do cities, I don’t do crowds, I do trees, trails, and tellin’ the rest of the world to fuck off.” This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee wraps pure backwoods attitude in buttery-soft comfort, perfect for choppin’ wood, crackin’ beers by the fire, or just remindin’ every flatlander that some people were born to live high, stay high, and die high in the fuckin’ pines.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Tailored for the pine rats who’d rather die standin’ in the dirt than live kneelin’ in concrete, the ones who know the best therapy is altitude and the best company is silence. Whether you’re haulin’ firewood, sippin’ whiskey at the overlook, or just flexin’ that “I belong up here” energy from wherever the hell you’re stuck today, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ envy, and remindin’ the world that some souls only thrive above the tree line.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the High in the Pines T-Shirt and let your elevation speak louder than words—because down there is for tourists, and up here is for the real ones. 🌲🔥😈\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078562770989,"sku":"20766778006748575055","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078562869293,"sku":"57055246182154415744","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44825184731181,"sku":"59887639088019423953","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078562902061,"sku":"30865473137682492937","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078563000365,"sku":"30900830284493070190","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44825184763949,"sku":"21469666656061332689","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078563033133,"sku":"29007568996028452586","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078563131437,"sku":"15501211789940175553","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44825184796717,"sku":"23636081936348162870","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078563164205,"sku":"27472788079310197351","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078563262509,"sku":"39296513422981685049","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44825184829485,"sku":"28420237814236088404","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078563295277,"sku":"20107039353580595302","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078563393581,"sku":"26323859879627604497","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825184862253,"sku":"15455809631269304287","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078563426349,"sku":"35896954858134766145","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078563524653,"sku":"25161191776014681205","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825184895021,"sku":"15198831367553739517","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/3281467633220622479_2048.jpg?v=1775842212"},{"product_id":"70v3-0n3-l0v3-77-freedom-tee","title":"70v3 Deep, @77 Higher, 0n3 Forever","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the vibes run deep and the love hits harder than a fresh snowfall, High in the Pines brings you the \u003cstrong\u003e70v3 0n3 l0v3 @77 High in the Pines T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a bold, encrypted ode to unity, rebellion, and that unbreakable connection to the wild that keeps us all comin’ back for more.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e70v3 0n3 l0v3 @77 High in the Pines T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Embrace the code with the \u003cstrong\u003e70v3 0n3 l0v3 @77 High in the Pines T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a clean, cryptic flex that spells out love in numbers and attitude, layered over that signature High in the Pines energy. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee is your go-to for mountain trails, late-night fires, or just rep’in the crew wherever the day takes you—soft, lived-in feel that only gets better with every adventure.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is perfect for layering under flannel, hittin’ the trail, or chillin’ with the pack. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Retail fit designed for both laid-back hangs and semi-formal swagger, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with whatever accessories you’re rockin’. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders keep the silhouette sharp, while dual side seams lock in shape through every wash and wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP—this tee carries the 70v3 0n3 l0v3 @77 spirit with real-deal values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e Tear-away label eliminates itch, so you can focus on the love, the pines, and the good vibes without distraction.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Whether you’re spreadin’ love in the streets, vibin’ deep in the forest, or just reppin’ the code that ties us all together, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ nods, and sayin’ “we’re in this together” without sayin’ a word.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003e70v3 0n3 l0v3 @77 High in the Pines T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let the love radiate—because some messages hit different when they’re worn loud and proud. 🌲❤️✨\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078578761773,"sku":"25166470932204674710","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078578794541,"sku":"27064343157045126448","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ S","offer_id":44825227362349,"sku":"26745940988553757790","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078578860077,"sku":"12318029549944347601","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44825227395117,"sku":"84671848301197164457","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078578892845,"sku":"70130916609978489321","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078578925613,"sku":"77980069496681765755","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ M","offer_id":44825227427885,"sku":"32564299634212500017","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078578991149,"sku":"56353393790665049154","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44825227460653,"sku":"44455390334123560814","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078579023917,"sku":"11665273322461421701","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078579056685,"sku":"39264406568517333245","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ L","offer_id":44825227493421,"sku":"43162523982563073242","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078579122221,"sku":"27897759683469099964","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44825227526189,"sku":"21320494234572321222","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078579154989,"sku":"23101356174167125261","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078579187757,"sku":"17916499724432860746","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ XL","offer_id":44825227558957,"sku":"23491286249789663481","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078579253293,"sku":"25905420552966019663","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44825227591725,"sku":"30606409576702138507","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078579286061,"sku":"32270438481582582552","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078579318829,"sku":"10775712275573087536","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825227624493,"sku":"11491671835828419623","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078579384365,"sku":"16962507864745255602","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825227657261,"sku":"26877484433954111676","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078579417133,"sku":"75830755416362173402","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078579449901,"sku":"35130429212469514351","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825227690029,"sku":"14609274001716926622","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078579515437,"sku":"57871485110723007486","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825227722797,"sku":"56036350794906700035","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/17620309903207818034_2048.jpg?v=1775844428"},{"product_id":"gr33n3d-out-medical-t33","title":"Fully Medicated","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the green hits harder than a fresh harvest and the vibes stay elevated 24\/7, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eGr33n3d 0ut T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a bold, no-apologies blaze that says “I’m high, I’m out, and I ain’t comin’ down for nobody.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eGr33n3d 0ut T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Light up the room (or the trail) with the Gr33n3d 0ut T-Shirt—a raw, glowing green cross fused with a razor-sharp cannabis leaf that screams “fully medicated, fully checked out, fully fuck it.” This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee wraps unfiltered stoner supremacy in buttery-soft comfort, perfect for hot-boxin’ the truck, post-blaze hikes, or just flexin’ that “I’m too high for your bullshit” energy louder than a bong rip at dawn.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for blazing sessions, lazy days, or layering with a lazy grin. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal stoner vibes, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with your favorite accessories (or just your lighter). Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every sesh and wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your high-life energy with real-deal values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, letting you rock the “Gr33n3d 0ut” haze with zero itch and maximum chill.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the ones who stay medicated, the ones who live elevated, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “I’m high as fuck and I’m proud” without sayin’ a word. Whether you’re blazin’ trails, couch-locked at home, or just flexin’ that perpetual green glow from wherever the fuck you are, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ knowing nods, and remindin’ the world that some people don’t come down—they just get higher.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Gr33n3d 0ut T-Shirt and let your elevated legend status shine—because normal is for people who still give a fuck about sobriety. 🌿🔥😈\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078611693613,"sku":"25306122756946146447","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ S","offer_id":44078611791917,"sku":"26106842140681994721","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078611824685,"sku":"36657607389164287419","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44825182076973,"sku":"30293926967572771904","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44825182109741,"sku":"23060465030420164163","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078611922989,"sku":"25549577534098088071","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ M","offer_id":44078612021293,"sku":"28395274398845622314","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078612054061,"sku":"83157088853267777592","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44825182142509,"sku":"25991347417121878793","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44825182175277,"sku":"25033524939264283910","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078612152365,"sku":"29857104086134361362","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ L","offer_id":44078612250669,"sku":"10810779642406397377","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078612283437,"sku":"15466834966911605145","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44825182208045,"sku":"27900702015431626487","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44825182240813,"sku":"31196478274818790155","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078612381741,"sku":"16859517157754238265","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ XL","offer_id":44078612480045,"sku":"18441599234908096329","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078612512813,"sku":"17138589014927630189","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44825182273581,"sku":"92019227680659315946","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44825182306349,"sku":"18451624544772297405","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078612611117,"sku":"43963964599425709835","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078612742189,"sku":"22000844771138391673","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825182339117,"sku":"32846754452434343518","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825182371885,"sku":"32579696416504327204","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078612840493,"sku":"24465775418271866048","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078612971565,"sku":"68470700249980088788","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825182404653,"sku":"22065300647649498347","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825182437421,"sku":"98765076595585398737","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/2747051706358459470_2048.jpg?v=1775842188"},{"product_id":"trump-s-tater-tot-takeover-tee","title":"Small Fry, Big Lies","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the taters get roasted and the bullshit gets peeled back layer by layer, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eDick Tater T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a merciless, spud-sized roast that turns the big orange man into the small-dick joke he’s always been.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDick Tater T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Carve up the clown with the Dick Tater T-Shirt—a savage, no-holds-barred tee featuring Trump reimagined as a smug, stubby tater tot in a suit, finger-waggin’ like he’s still got something to say while “Dick Tater” slams across the top in bold, unapologetic letters. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee mixes brutal political satire with buttery-soft comfort, perfect for barbecues where the MAGA hats show up, family reunions that turn into cage matches, or just flexin’ that “I see through the con” energy louder than a rally chant.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for heated debates, casual hangs, or layering with pure spite. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal shade-throwin’, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with whatever middle finger you’re wearin’ today. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every roast and wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your savage truth-tellin’ with real-deal values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, lettin’ you rock the “Dick Tater” burn with zero itch and maximum smug satisfaction.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the ones who’ve had enough of the orange con-man, the ones who laugh at the cult while the cult cries “fake news,” and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “small hands, smaller dick, massive fraud” without sayin’ a word. Whether you’re at the protest, the bar, the cookout, or just ownin’ the timeline from your couch, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ meltdowns, and remindin’ the world that some taters are just dicks in disguise.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Dick Tater T-Shirt and let your spud-sized roast shine—because some leaders are just tiny, greasy disappointments. 🍟🔥😈\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078625128493,"sku":"23411842692060259722","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078625161261,"sku":"12541625685440828306","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44078625259565,"sku":"71055793846586762562","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078625357869,"sku":"35198337402006970424","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44825188433965,"sku":"23786653154932257832","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078625423405,"sku":"20914151637881014975","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078625456173,"sku":"20810894487065451997","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44078625554477,"sku":"80446467015964258733","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078625652781,"sku":"25405857856842857570","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44825188466733,"sku":"29539009078767716199","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078625718317,"sku":"25193243445665124280","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078625751085,"sku":"16810146724112353993","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44078625849389,"sku":"20688452103923392191","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078625947693,"sku":"68794065273031628819","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44825188499501,"sku":"26561114303177593887","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078626013229,"sku":"23287626189370511416","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078626045997,"sku":"15038049520742115584","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44078626144301,"sku":"29200908816847506392","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078626242605,"sku":"31211546190868023652","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44825188532269,"sku":"23905383071924184388","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078626308141,"sku":"20962107810439836190","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078626340909,"sku":"32778976690932098626","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078626439213,"sku":"50364437805941135136","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078626537517,"sku":"26392792975820839579","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825188565037,"sku":"72217653647103252855","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078626603053,"sku":"31818844931298665732","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078626635821,"sku":"98395678484201883455","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078626734125,"sku":"31823443308314490509","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078626832429,"sku":"19927360507421619465","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825188597805,"sku":"51868159041805185697","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/8405814607828118336_2048.jpg?v=1775842365"},{"product_id":"just-drag-union-walkout-tee","title":"Quit Like a Boss, Fuck Like a Legend","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where bosses bleed and workers finally breathe, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eJust Drag T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a cold, hard “I quit” carved into cotton that says “fuck you, your company, your deadlines, your bullshit meetings, and every second I wasted breathing your air.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eJust Drag T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Scream it without opening your mouth with the Just Drag T-Shirt—a raw, defiant middle finger to every soul-sucking job that ever tried to own you. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee wraps pure “I’m done, I’m out, drag my ass if you want but I’m gone” energy in buttery-soft comfort, perfect for walkin’ out the door, burnin’ bridges on the way, or just remindin’ every corporate parasite that when a worker says “just drag,” they mean drag the whole rotting empire behind them and watch it bleed.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for picket-line marathons, victory beers after the walkout, or layering with pure spite. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal rebellion, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with whatever protest gear or middle finger you’re wearin’ today. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every chant, every march, every “fuck this job forever” moment.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your working-class fury with real-deal integrity.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, letting you rock the “Just Drag” energy with zero itch and maximum “I quit and I’m proud” swagger.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Tailored for the ones who’ve had enough, the ones who walk out and never look back, the ones who drag the whole rotten machine behind them like a corpse on a chain. Whether you’re holdin’ the line at the gate, drinkin’ victory beers after the strike, or just flexin’ that “I quit and your company can choke on it” energy from the couch, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ solidarity, and remindin’ every boss that when the workers say “just drag,” they fucking mean drag your corpse all the way to hell.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Just Drag T-Shirt and let your “I quit, fuck you and your company” spirit burn bright—because quitting ain’t defeat, it’s the sweetest revenge. ✊🔥\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078637121581,"sku":"13403441492647986932","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078637154349,"sku":"88420157475330754900","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078637350957,"sku":"20994683598996740043","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078637416493,"sku":"14414096826728253906","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078637449261,"sku":"11526292256268535624","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078637645869,"sku":"52688350178802506438","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078637711405,"sku":"17839777194829531263","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078637744173,"sku":"26495051646639935269","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078637940781,"sku":"15728260863082364311","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078638006317,"sku":"25863722305615009243","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078638039085,"sku":"19732052364694517887","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078638235693,"sku":"70503621788928201975","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078638301229,"sku":"16921495421272967252","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078638333997,"sku":"48839991486314496932","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078638530605,"sku":"24123443462750425257","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078638596141,"sku":"14006054441115447900","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078638628909,"sku":"18035034546730112982","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078638825517,"sku":"32248200799708275664","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/15953891627259376278_2048.jpg?v=1775839860"},{"product_id":"fuck-all-the-way-off-attitude-tee","title":"Pack Your Shit and Keep Packin’","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the bullshit piles high and the patience runs drier than a desert wind, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eFuck All The Way Off T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a brutal, dripping red middle finger that says “get the hell out” with zero room for negotiation.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFuck All The Way Off T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Make a fearless statement with the Fuck All The Way Off T-Shirt—a raw, unapologetic tee that’s all about setting boundaries with savage attitude and ultimate comfort. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee combines brutal expression with cozy cotton, perfect for telling the world (or that one specific clown) to fuck right off with a cheeky grin.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for casual hangs, bold outings, or layering with edge. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal vibes, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with your favorite accessories. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your no-nonsense spirit with solid values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, letting you rock the \"Fuck All The Way Off\" energy with ease and confidence.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for those who aren’t afraid to draw the line, this soft, high-quality tee is your ticket to clearing space, sparking reactions, and owning your truth with zero hesitation.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Fuck All The Way Off T-Shirt and let your bold, take-no-shit vibe shine!\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078657634349,"sku":"58246990640694698524","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078657798189,"sku":"17900408650115344724","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078657863725,"sku":"46967324420019205341","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078658027565,"sku":"21459740648128362878","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078658093101,"sku":"22777870883057808145","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078658256941,"sku":"76966494285534216423","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078658322477,"sku":"21826086034750828081","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078658486317,"sku":"24742901270131458235","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078658551853,"sku":"13933110078723454430","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078658715693,"sku":"29798286532617804690","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078658781229,"sku":"14214672987949122355","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078658945069,"sku":"42290138059576708705","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/18354848471075107444_2048.jpg?v=1775844341"},{"product_id":"catch-n-blow-tadpole-tee","title":"Swallowed More DNA Than 23andMe","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the only thing thicker than the underbrush is the load you’re proudly hoardin’, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003eTadpole Collector T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a shameless, ball-draining badge of honor for the relentless cum-guzzlers who treat every swallow like a goddamn trophy hunt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eTadpole Collector T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Wear your degeneracy loud and proud with the Tadpole Collector T-Shirt—a vicious, unfiltered roast that turns “swallow” into a full-time occupation. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee wraps your semen-slurpin’ obsession in buttery-soft comfort, perfect for post-blowjob flexin’, bar confessions where everyone pretends they’ve never done it, or just remindin’ the world that some collectors don’t stop at stamps—they go straight for the swimmers.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for sticky nights, hungover brunches, or layering with a guilty grin. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal shame walks, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with whatever excuse you’re wearin’ today. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every cringe and cackle.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your ball-draining spirit with real-deal values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, lettin’ you rock the “Tadpole Collector” truth with zero itch and maximum shameless shrug.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Tailored for the throat queens \u0026amp; kings who’ve turned “cum dumpster” into a resume bullet point, the deep-throat disasters who collect more swimmers than a sperm bank, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “I swallow and I’m proud” without openin’ their mouth (because it’s probably still full). Whether you’re relivin’ the glory at the bar, flexin’ at brunch, or just ownin’ the day with zero fucks left for dignity, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ knowing winces, and remindin’ the world that some collections are measured in loads, not stamps.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Tadpole Collector T-Shirt and let your filthy legend status shine—because real ones don’t spit, they collect. 🐸💦😈\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078683389997,"sku":"21707064640788171843","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078683422765,"sku":"18093464850956931474","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078683521069,"sku":"26715289120498795382","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078683553837,"sku":"10561756289491085406","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078683586605,"sku":"61649574465072609404","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078683684909,"sku":"29892759309663083122","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078683717677,"sku":"13517733722315712803","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078683750445,"sku":"67304800024853453672","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078683848749,"sku":"17780721759235574939","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078683881517,"sku":"18143748604091956818","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078683914285,"sku":"14951788755624117246","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078684012589,"sku":"93648273761030562818","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078684045357,"sku":"30601928716697620755","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078684078125,"sku":"22478500951070637568","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078684176429,"sku":"23717057701542015628","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078684209197,"sku":"19147812068444685355","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078684241965,"sku":"18614403002978009175","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078684340269,"sku":"59836635362456942180","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/12184636680678800994_2048.jpg?v=1775840126"},{"product_id":"sausage-peeler-suckin-skin-tee","title":"Peel So Deep They Call Me The Butcher","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the sausage jokes fly faster than a chainsaw and nobody’s safe from the peel, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003eSausage Peeler T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a filthy, grinning gut-punch that says “yeah I peel ’em, and yeah I’m proud of it, what the fuck you gonna do about it?”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSausage Peeler T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Unleash your dirtiest smirk with the Sausage Peeler T-Shirt—a shameless, no-holds-barred tee starring a cocky little sausage dude mid-strut, legs swingin’, grin wide, ready to peel back every layer of innocence in the room. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee wraps pure, unfiltered innuendo in buttery-soft comfort, perfect for bar nights where the jokes get nasty, gym flexes where the thirst traps are real, or just remindin’ the world that some peelers don’t stop at the skin.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for sweaty nights, casual debauchery, or layering with a filthy grin. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal chaos, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with whatever (or whoever) you’re wearin’ tonight. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every thrust of laughter.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your degenerate spirit with real-deal values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, letting you rock the \"Sausage Peeler\" energy with zero itch and maximum shameless swagger.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the filthy-minded legends who know peeling is an art form, the ones who turn every sausage into a punchline, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “I peel ’em and eat ’em” without opening their mouth (because it’s probably full). Whether you’re grilling at the cookout, flexin’ at the bar, or just ownin’ the day with zero fucks left for innocence, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ dirty grins, and remindin’ the world that some peelers don’t stop till the skin’s gone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Sausage Peeler T-Shirt and let your spicy, sausage-slayin’ legend status shine—because real ones peel deep and leave no survivors. 🍆😈\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078696071213,"sku":"33645535964888665555","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078696103981,"sku":"12321892310902807389","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078696333357,"sku":"11823633179296678924","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44825191055405,"sku":"31953984995103690959","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078696398893,"sku":"22191704155718776467","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078696431661,"sku":"21476303653808486254","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078696661037,"sku":"25887379123502707018","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44825191088173,"sku":"21675002006204606212","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078696726573,"sku":"58419635128034921649","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078696759341,"sku":"31134241010741112401","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078696988717,"sku":"24653193995114372783","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44825191120941,"sku":"16078961705418232262","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078697054253,"sku":"13216780647471800224","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078697087021,"sku":"10092206411483634994","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078697316397,"sku":"23340898677372728561","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44825191153709,"sku":"19253322855467757066","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078697381933,"sku":"14934672843129257689","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078697414701,"sku":"31797478355760137787","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078697644077,"sku":"27743651582895201486","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825191186477,"sku":"23329475815474122805","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078697709613,"sku":"32521496520006615775","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078697742381,"sku":"16536249130957658146","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078697971757,"sku":"23810197709680279875","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825191219245,"sku":"64789811637500109254","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/15798450596507349655_2048.jpg?v=1775842580"},{"product_id":"long-johns-low-urinal-legend-tee","title":"Your mom wants it","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the urinals run deep and the short-dick jokes run even deeper, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003eLong Johns T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a merciless, piss-takin’ roast that says “yeah, mine hangs lower than yours, and the proof’s right here on my chest, bitch.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eLong Johns T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Unfold your savage confidence with the Long Johns T-Shirt—a brutal, laugh-or-cry tee that celebrates extra length with three urinals: two normal ones and one mounted so goddamn low it’s basically a handicap stall for hung legends. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee mixes filthy locker-room humor with everyday comfort, perfect for flexin’ at the bar, droppin’ truth in the locker room, or just remindin’ every short-stack in the room that some kings measure in inches, not excuses.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for sweaty workouts, post-piss flex sessions, or layering with zero shame. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal vibes, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with whatever ego you’re packin’ today. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your long-dick energy with real values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, letting you rock the “Long Johns” superiority with zero itch and maximum hang time.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the hung legends who know the urinal height chart don’t lie, the ones who’ve made grown men question their genetics, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “measure up or shut up” without droppin’ trou. Whether you’re pissin’ at the bar, flexin’ in the locker room, or just ownin’ the day with cocky swagger, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ envy, and remindin’ every short king that the low urinal is for winners only.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Long Johns T-Shirt and let your extra-long legend status hang loud and proud—because some advantages are measured in porcelain inches. 🍆🪠😈\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078708326445,"sku":"19842551081144956661","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078708359213,"sku":"20831522957174579403","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078708523053,"sku":"13068919017322363636","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44825190858797,"sku":"29546132450243648936","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078708555821,"sku":"43804249871321108136","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078708588589,"sku":"26397331575949551603","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078708752429,"sku":"33800061995269613129","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44825190891565,"sku":"24949714155109870000","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078708785197,"sku":"25580123988857603070","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078708817965,"sku":"25774537006522096430","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078708981805,"sku":"26667723531599574605","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44825190924333,"sku":"13025595822152094567","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078709014573,"sku":"51964262234622596944","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078709047341,"sku":"87931008413277460361","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078709211181,"sku":"26309268794680929582","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44825190957101,"sku":"27460872673135265289","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078709243949,"sku":"18451706527953318482","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078709276717,"sku":"24188188984664799319","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078709440557,"sku":"33218404606014183592","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825190989869,"sku":"18937289959030956667","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078709473325,"sku":"13239564462998297349","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078709506093,"sku":"13166488437781463887","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078709669933,"sku":"12414320322684942174","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825191022637,"sku":"17363529783305407760","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/17257064812833271366_2048.jpg?v=1775842570"},{"product_id":"gay-dna-loud-proud-t-shirt","title":"Born This Way, Stayin’ This Way, Fuck the Rest","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the colors run true and the heart don’t give a damn who’s watchin’, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eGay Is In My DNA T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a loud, proud, rainbow-soaked flex that says your truth ain’t up for debate, it’s coded straight into the blueprint.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eGay Is In My DNA T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Own every inch of who you are with the Gay Is In My DNA T-Shirt—a fierce, unfiltered tee that slaps a bold rainbow flag backdrop behind the no-apologies declaration “Gay Is In My DNA,” loud enough to shut down the haters and bright enough to light up the darkest room. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee mixes fierce pride with everyday comfort, perfect for pride parades, casual days, or just remindin’ the world your love runs deeper than their opinions.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for all-day wear, pride events, or layering with swagger. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal vibes, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with your favorite accessories. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your bold pride with solid values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, letting you rock your “Gay Is In My DNA” energy with ease and confidence.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for those who live loud, love louder, and never apologize for being exactly who they are, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning heads, starting conversations, and celebrating the truth written in every cell.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Gay Is In My DNA T-Shirt and let your pride shine brighter than the damn sun—because some things are just in the code, and that’s beautiful as hell. 🌈🖤✨\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078718582829,"sku":"19222971994725610659","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078718615597,"sku":"17221838971276410365","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Turquoise \/ S","offer_id":44078718746669,"sku":"22366069497318256359","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078718812205,"sku":"13570259542371620980","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44825226018861,"sku":"24939605751687799898","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078718844973,"sku":"12852697880281349192","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078718877741,"sku":"55143103748415269525","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Turquoise \/ M","offer_id":44078719008813,"sku":"22661854505187112121","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078719074349,"sku":"13509527747553738413","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44825226051629,"sku":"23599728674119629021","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078719107117,"sku":"13537031326489889082","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078719139885,"sku":"14456018161270863901","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Turquoise \/ L","offer_id":44078719270957,"sku":"83180716614358967444","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078719336493,"sku":"45784596729658489074","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44825226084397,"sku":"33624565190826438705","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078719369261,"sku":"76185222653733782342","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078719402029,"sku":"24171010341725786614","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Turquoise \/ XL","offer_id":44078719533101,"sku":"24459446307496597719","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078719598637,"sku":"53217246851430889404","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44825226117165,"sku":"11439182592377354111","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078719631405,"sku":"85267010978189199944","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078719664173,"sku":"20384977172741894487","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Turquoise \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078719795245,"sku":"14338394697251556173","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078719860781,"sku":"16986975748175245497","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825226149933,"sku":"20797703593388047303","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078719893549,"sku":"14358781801077836383","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078719926317,"sku":"33344950951928676450","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Turquoise \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078720057389,"sku":"19930315896970772135","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078720122925,"sku":"19897280010793437063","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825226182701,"sku":"10777041277952518015","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/8829637626929912998_2048.jpg?v=1775844289"},{"product_id":"absophuckinlutly-swagger-tee","title":"The Word You Feel When “Yes” Ain’t Enough","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the bullshit meter stays pegged and the attitude runs hotter than a summer bonfire, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003eAbsophuckinlutly T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a no-filter, full-send declaration that says “hell yes” louder than your ex ever screamed “no.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eAbsophuckinlutly T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Say it loud and proud with the Absophuckinlutly T-Shirt—a sassy, no-holds-barred tee that screams confidence and unapologetic attitude! This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee combines bold expression with cozy comfort, perfect for owning any moment with a cheeky grin.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for casual hangs, bold outings, or layering with swagger. Fabric blends include:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eAsh and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal vibes, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with your favorite accessories. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your bold vibe with solid values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, letting you rock the \"Absophuckinlutly\" energy with ease and confidence.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for those who live life with a fearless, all-in attitude, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning heads, sparking laughs, and saying “hell yes” to every moment.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Absophuckinlutly T-Shirt and let your unapologetic spirit shine!\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078774616109,"sku":"11416011966854296045","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078774648877,"sku":"12692877946727573425","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44078774812717,"sku":"49433047607899517684","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078774911021,"sku":"32068333476439666347","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078774976557,"sku":"13886367857416587621","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078775009325,"sku":"11452995441859927273","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44078775173165,"sku":"14355385880709449010","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078775271469,"sku":"17900843966930123155","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078775337005,"sku":"16301414576249876018","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078775369773,"sku":"29708989811620973427","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44078775533613,"sku":"28285775493018577308","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078775631917,"sku":"27689200301633925065","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078775697453,"sku":"10924547215255633266","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078775730221,"sku":"23772195280631461806","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44078775894061,"sku":"19479587436052572370","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078775992365,"sku":"76681600896132052232","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078776057901,"sku":"18857489317450439499","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078776090669,"sku":"28797387147736573679","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078776254509,"sku":"17432977444587650582","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078776352813,"sku":"72305037861422459013","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078776418349,"sku":"30966825067372056355","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078776451117,"sku":"28043294787385815196","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078776614957,"sku":"43284279968532259246","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078776713261,"sku":"40700955723029620713","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/15675705451942794909_2048.jpg?v=1776772475"},{"product_id":"because-good-head-deserves-good-dental-hygiene","title":"Because Good Head Deserves Good Dental Hygiene","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eSome shirts whisper. This one walks straight up and says it to your face.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eWe didn't come here to be subtle and we didn't come here to apologize. The Good Head tee is for the person in the room who always says what everyone else is thinking — and looks damn good doing it. Wear it to the barbecue. Wear it to the hardware store. Watch what happens.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eLife's too short for boring shirts and bad hygiene. This one covers at least one of those.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric feels like your favorite broken-in tee right out the box — ideal for active days, lazy days, or layering when the vibes get chilly.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eFabric blends vary by color:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul class=\"[li_\u0026amp;]:mb-0 [li_\u0026amp;]:mt-1 [li_\u0026amp;]:gap-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ul]:pb-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ol]:pb-1 list-disc flex flex-col gap-1 pl-8 mb-3\"\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eAsh and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eHeather and Solid Blend: 52% cotton, 48% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eAthletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e| High in the Pines | Dirty Tees | Dad Jokes |\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078805221421,"sku":"23589896889412544707","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078805254189,"sku":"16757420638082977617","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078805418029,"sku":"32762396824533301612","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078805450797,"sku":"25040496782496446727","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078805483565,"sku":"17455127334575219651","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078805647405,"sku":"62480623252782164692","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078805680173,"sku":"11851874842163869494","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078805712941,"sku":"43918622894514957624","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078805876781,"sku":"29232595809137342358","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078805909549,"sku":"28803235240336204225","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078805942317,"sku":"67686609978357110031","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078806106157,"sku":"11208904797743002803","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078806138925,"sku":"23239292520429935109","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078806171693,"sku":"98283818663591491918","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078806335533,"sku":"56841793013139657912","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078806368301,"sku":"98441282282388107607","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078806401069,"sku":"10408902071687602699","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078806564909,"sku":"93860691876879622269","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/17279997034933775567_2048.jpg?v=1775842618"},{"product_id":"ispeakincursive-tee","title":"Verbal Velocity: Cursive Edition","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the words tumble out faster than a downhill stream and nobody can keep up, High in the Pines brings you the \u003cstrong\u003eISpeakInCursive T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a sly, speedy flex that says “yeah I talk fast, try to catch up, bitch.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eISpeakInCursive T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Let your words fly like they’re late for the train with the ISpeakInCursive T-Shirt—a cheeky, high-velocity tee that owns the truth: cursive ain’t just pretty handwriting, it’s how fast your mouth moves when your brain’s already three sentences ahead. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee mixes witty word-nerd energy with buttery-soft comfort, perfect for talkin’ circles around people, droppin’ rapid-fire burns, or just flexin’ that “I speak so fast you need subtitles” vibe louder than a chainsaw on espresso.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for fast-talkin’ hangouts, heated debates, or layering while you ramble at light speed. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal vibes, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with whatever chaos you’re wearin’ today. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders keep the silhouette sharp, while dual side seams hold shape through every rapid-fire rant.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your quick-tongue energy with real-deal values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, lettin’ you spit that cursive-speed fire with zero itch and maximum flow.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the fast-talkers who finish sentences before people realize you started, the ones who speak in cursive because normal speed is for slowpokes, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “catch up or get left” without slowin’ down. Whether you’re ramblin’ at the bar, roastin’ in group chats, or just livin’ that accelerated life, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ “wait what?” faces, and remindin’ the world that some mouths move faster than brains can process.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the ISpeakInCursive T-Shirt and let your words blur past ’em—because normal conversation is for people who still use print. 🖋️💨😈\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078811119661,"sku":"29537777589863554968","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078811152429,"sku":"79389881257299663540","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078811316269,"sku":"26213569197996993120","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078811349037,"sku":"24786878527440266827","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078811381805,"sku":"13214537308941695051","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078811545645,"sku":"22373785400834810054","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078811578413,"sku":"46363736256584166444","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078811611181,"sku":"27166755466754168860","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078811775021,"sku":"22652159905615944253","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078811807789,"sku":"25110820515886016503","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078811840557,"sku":"32064119275917193864","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078812004397,"sku":"27267953985021993377","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078812037165,"sku":"11303205969598020580","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078812069933,"sku":"18378094211931475251","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078812233773,"sku":"20241726304597057298","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078812266541,"sku":"31787721785340564364","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078812299309,"sku":"28560665713982049983","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078812463149,"sku":"21455947177635732807","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/11338992490748575162_2048.jpg?v=1775842862"},{"product_id":"lov3-3n3rgy-spark-tee","title":"The Kind of Love That Trips Breakers","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the energy crackles like a live wire and love hits harder than a backwoods storm, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eLov3 3n3rgy T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a glitchy, high-voltage love bomb that says “spread it or get the fuck out of the way.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eLov3 3n3rgy T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Ignite every damn room with the Lov3 3n3rgy T-Shirt—a raw, electrifying tee that radiates pure, unfiltered passion and chaotic good vibes. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee mixes glitchy cyber-love swagger with buttery-soft comfort, perfect for late-night drives, festival pits, or just reminding everyone around you that your energy is contagious, dangerous, and absolutely non-negotiable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for high-octane days, casual chaos, or layering with attitude. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Retail fit built for both laid-back hangs and semi-formal flexes, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with whatever chain, bandana, or bad decision you’re wearing today. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders keep it sharp, while dual side seams lock in shape through every sweat-soaked night and sunrise regret.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP—this tee matches your high-energy chaos with real-deal integrity.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e Tear-away label means zero itch, zero bullshit—just pure, uninterrupted Lov3 3n3rgy flowing through you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Tailored for the ones who love like a wildfire, live like tomorrow’s cancelled, and spread energy so contagious it should come with a warning label. Whether you’re raging at the show, cruising backroads at 2 a.m., or just existing louder than everyone else, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for lighting up rooms, starting fires, and reminding the world that some love don’t ask permission.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Lov3 3n3rgy T-Shirt and let that radiant, unstoppable chaos pour out—because normal energy is for people who still give a fuck. 🔥❤️✨\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078830977069,"sku":"22652306474169966982","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078831009837,"sku":"25238302359083031782","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44078831140909,"sku":"24220793623374915553","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ S","offer_id":44825194332205,"sku":"20790840962924255159","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078831239213,"sku":"32927828787871095006","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44825194364973,"sku":"29263087401636272895","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lilac \/ S","offer_id":44825194397741,"sku":"55825234207286225946","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078831271981,"sku":"18409651830836647505","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078831304749,"sku":"11089309923056600572","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44078831435821,"sku":"38438393421537022831","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ M","offer_id":44825194430509,"sku":"16960668531626448231","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078831534125,"sku":"18085844478381408732","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44825194463277,"sku":"24859441314613007379","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lilac \/ M","offer_id":44825194496045,"sku":"41258576073291873362","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078831566893,"sku":"15659153693146624807","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078831599661,"sku":"23631110397331977243","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44078831730733,"sku":"31063216595247774476","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ L","offer_id":44825194528813,"sku":"19965347223388062426","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078831829037,"sku":"17066282240458147568","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44825194561581,"sku":"65254556795881103408","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lilac \/ L","offer_id":44825194594349,"sku":"14897846992671181294","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078831861805,"sku":"31766179695354550615","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078831894573,"sku":"82464465965985613833","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44078832025645,"sku":"55643422479231103214","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ XL","offer_id":44825194627117,"sku":"30001573052231518025","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078832123949,"sku":"11101246946924851653","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44825194659885,"sku":"14778071064307351582","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lilac \/ XL","offer_id":44825194692653,"sku":"17158820449808158545","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078832156717,"sku":"16288104980884761703","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078832189485,"sku":"17534008692147045214","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078832320557,"sku":"26417492302153015999","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825194725421,"sku":"20248976187504116335","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078832418861,"sku":"22225506661008406484","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825194758189,"sku":"11806073337727894665","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lilac \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825194790957,"sku":"19126864618739806400","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078832451629,"sku":"33380722842373706581","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078832484397,"sku":"13367985655644890777","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078832615469,"sku":"22120812104813463725","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825194823725,"sku":"13322026787283157831","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078832713773,"sku":"26918456029831823017","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825194856493,"sku":"17212399096673698358","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lilac \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825194889261,"sku":"30573543674245609484","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/11311102929282864434_2048.jpg?v=1775843326"},{"product_id":"only-local-tee","title":"We Don’t Shop Where the Soul Died","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the big-box empires can kiss our local ass and the real ones keep it close to home, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eOnly Local T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a territorial, no-compromise flex that says “support the little guy or get the fuck out of my town.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eOnly Local T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Claim your turf with the Only Local T-Shirt—a bold, territorial tee that screams small-town supremacy and zero tolerance for corporate chains sucking the life out of your community. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee mixes fierce hometown loyalty with everyday comfort, perfect for market runs, local events, or just remindin’ every out-of-towner that if it ain’t local, it ain’t worth a damn thing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for farmer’s market strolls, backyard BBQs, or layering with small-town swagger. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal vibes, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with your favorite accessories. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your local-first attitude with real values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, letting you rock the “Only Local” energy with ease and zero compromise.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the ones who shop the mom-and-pop spots, tip the local barista extra, and tell chain-store drones to eat shit—this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ nods from the right crowd, and remindin’ everyone that if it ain’t local, it ain’t fuckin’ welcome.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Only Local T-Shirt and let your community pride hit harder than a small-town grudge—because some things are only good when they’re ours. 🌲🛍️🔥\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078863351853,"sku":"89046620901464094089","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44078863450157,"sku":"22335222691610828446","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078863482925,"sku":"25234048362747775439","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078863515693,"sku":"22985706008595493519","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44078863613997,"sku":"81962706233022368225","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078863646765,"sku":"24171653795639902774","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078863679533,"sku":"28873622735666726112","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44078863777837,"sku":"94044601742521256331","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078863810605,"sku":"12853174448218171217","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078863843373,"sku":"31070523618581223978","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44078863941677,"sku":"21801465797085210780","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078863974445,"sku":"28042124922475280210","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078864007213,"sku":"42503902701321070138","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078864105517,"sku":"11143028874228287755","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078864138285,"sku":"16598686408351037873","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078864171053,"sku":"20375946827065940679","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078864269357,"sku":"94192714599531504828","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078864302125,"sku":"44843693207644289892","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/6702253350925240831_2048.jpg?v=1775843334"},{"product_id":"outside-aisles-only-grocery-guru-tee","title":"Edge Lords Rise, Shelf Zombies Fall","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the fluorescent lights flicker and the center aisles are for suckers, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eOutside Aisles Only T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a savage, no-compromise declaration that real shoppers know the gold lives on the perimeter and the middle is just processed garbage.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eOutside Aisles Only T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Stick to the edges like a boss with the Outside Aisles Only T-Shirt—a ruthless, unapologetic tee that roasts the center-aisle zombies and celebrates the elite who hunt the perimeter for the real goods: fresh meat, real produce, eggs that didn’t come from a factory farm, and zero processed bullshit. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee blends supermarket supremacy with everyday comfort, perfect for owning grocery runs, flexing your perimeter game at the checkout, or just reminding the world that if you’re shoppin’ the middle, you’re basically eating cardboard with extra steps.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for grocery hauls, casual flexes, or layering with a smirk. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal vibes, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with your favorite accessories. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every cart push and checkout glare.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your perimeter-pride energy with real values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, letting you rock the “Outside Aisles Only” supremacy with zero itch and maximum disdain for the middle.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the strategic savages who know the outer aisles are where the real food lives, the ones who treat the grocery store like a battlefield and the center like enemy territory, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “I don’t fuck with the middle” without opening their mouth. Whether you’re huntin’ fresh produce, dodgin’ the processed poison, or just flexin’ that superior shopping IQ from the couch, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning heads, sparking envy, and reminding every cart-pusher that real ones stay outside.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Outside Aisles Only T-Shirt and let your perimeter game shine—because the middle is for tourists, and you’re built different. 🛒🔥\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078906048557,"sku":"13661262029421054281","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078906081325,"sku":"17239615899431944528","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ S","offer_id":44825210650669,"sku":"24607419743846271036","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078906245165,"sku":"10553913697531783322","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44825210683437,"sku":"20319288145905064623","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078906310701,"sku":"11474950946066497266","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078906343469,"sku":"21103172952532151111","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ M","offer_id":44825210716205,"sku":"97776256067919449042","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078906507309,"sku":"31137048664384895632","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44825210748973,"sku":"89430433639598831358","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078906572845,"sku":"15892616029013590886","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078906605613,"sku":"21732531027892170070","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ L","offer_id":44825210781741,"sku":"30702052672772074486","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078906769453,"sku":"73072017933439486584","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44825210814509,"sku":"53203239090601930419","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078906834989,"sku":"25593989526816962927","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078906867757,"sku":"22876884325035990102","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ XL","offer_id":44825210847277,"sku":"89392892150435852220","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078907031597,"sku":"13804027296122990481","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44825210880045,"sku":"14451404717358871407","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078907097133,"sku":"24316791016716190339","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078907129901,"sku":"24114267153885091494","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825210912813,"sku":"29851551223645091790","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078907293741,"sku":"32702816938290937031","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825210945581,"sku":"24944439325000722371","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078907359277,"sku":"80362227907512914230","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078907392045,"sku":"33044507413514834100","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Teal \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825210978349,"sku":"66407013685260772638","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078907555885,"sku":"18134917516350128950","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825211011117,"sku":"33585246697785342269","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/12046229634901053426_2048.jpg?v=1775843514"},{"product_id":"buff-in-the-puff-tee","title":"Gains So Big They Need Their Own ZIP Code","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the iron clangs like thunder and the gains don’t whisper—they roar, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003ePuffy T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a savage, no-apologies flex that celebrates the kind of pump so ridiculous it looks like you swallowed a bicycle pump.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePuffy T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Flex your gains and your humor with the Puffy T-Shirt—a brutally bold tee built for bodybuilders who’ve outgrown “normal” and now live in permanent swole territory. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee combines unapologetic gym swagger with everyday comfort, perfect for strutting through the weight room like you own every plate, or just reminding the world that “puffy” ain’t a look—it’s a lifestyle.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for intense workouts, post-pump flex sessions, or layering with zero shame. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit tailored to highlight your chiseled frame, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with your favorite gym gear or accessories. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every rep and wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your iron discipline with real values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, letting you rock the \"Puffy\" energy with zero itch and maximum pump pride.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the lifters who’ve turned “puffy” into a badge of honor, the gym rats who know the mirror doesn’t lie (but your sleeves might), and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “I’m jacked and I know it” without opening their mouth. Whether you’re crushing PRs, owning the locker room, or just flexing that post-workout glow from the couch, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning heads, sparking envy, and reminding everyone that some gains are too big for words.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Puffy T-Shirt and let your swole pride puff up loud and proud—because normal is for people who lift light. 💪🖤\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078936457261,"sku":"22269827236513728662","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078936490029,"sku":"27720590507127810687","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078936719405,"sku":"31664164616046472969","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44825214255149,"sku":"12117401419438209983","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078936752173,"sku":"75051515934567975177","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078936784941,"sku":"16301464563309139283","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078937014317,"sku":"33076895181288400659","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44825214287917,"sku":"33909654185144654357","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078937047085,"sku":"25056361107454201506","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078937079853,"sku":"11397552835809772787","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078937309229,"sku":"10002269213731157832","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44825214320685,"sku":"65095855700460372526","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078937341997,"sku":"23824094946543415742","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078937374765,"sku":"76402406519189129662","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078937604141,"sku":"33402811423838290095","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44825214353453,"sku":"17041031492320161295","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078937636909,"sku":"15984253627570993739","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078937669677,"sku":"12807833057691690371","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078937899053,"sku":"11386459736030300136","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825214386221,"sku":"12635340935722797745","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078937931821,"sku":"11967428525130827778","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078937964589,"sku":"54651117104404075415","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078938193965,"sku":"51986141327937094566","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825214418989,"sku":"49364927257844264922","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/1051391128507481700_2048.jpg?v=1775843588"},{"product_id":"talk-shit-with-thumps-troll-tee","title":"Digital Slaughterhouse, Single-Handed","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the keyboard smokes and the timelines bleed, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003eTalk Shit With Thumps T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a raw, unfiltered war cry for the digital barbarians who drop bodies with rapid-fire thumbs and zero remorse.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eTalk Shit With Thumps T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Unleash your inner keyboard barbarian with the Talk Shit With Thumps T-Shirt—a savage, no-mercy tee that celebrates the art of throwing digital shade, ratioing clowns, and owning the comment section like it’s your personal kill floor. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee blends ruthless online bravado with everyday comfort, perfect for late-night troll slaying, group-chat domination, or just flexing that “my thumbs are weapons” energy louder than a notification barrage.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for marathon doomscrolling, heated reply chains, or layering with pure spite. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal vibes, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with your favorite accessories. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your ruthless spirit with solid values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, letting you rock the \"Talk Shit With Thumps\" energy with zero distractions and maximum trigger speed.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the ones who live for the ratio, the clap-back assassins who turn notifications into body counts, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “I type faster than you think” without opening their mouth. Whether you’re doomscrolling at dawn, owning the comments at midnight, or just flexing that keyboard-warrior soul from the couch, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning heads, sparking beefs, and reminding the internet that some warriors don’t need swords—just thumbs.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Talk Shit With Thumps T-Shirt and let your digital dominance thumb loud and proud!\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078968668205,"sku":"60729210247029280481","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078968700973,"sku":"33035247638389549693","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"True Royal \/ S","offer_id":44078968832045,"sku":"86393610654470985934","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078968864813,"sku":"44464402215591647442","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078968897581,"sku":"26148786212308401183","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078968930349,"sku":"14877713301806497996","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"True Royal \/ M","offer_id":44078969061421,"sku":"24101297141603266603","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078969094189,"sku":"82031927420714691798","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078969126957,"sku":"14028724867258922794","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078969159725,"sku":"11155368755844582247","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"True Royal \/ L","offer_id":44078969290797,"sku":"18063448249506653801","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078969323565,"sku":"27686969019550243669","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078969356333,"sku":"13041188666222620709","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078969389101,"sku":"17491668870799710866","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"True Royal \/ XL","offer_id":44078969520173,"sku":"30949386846829963286","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078969552941,"sku":"14226334292197449166","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078969585709,"sku":"56798482855446961402","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078969618477,"sku":"26113429112559733337","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"True Royal \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078969749549,"sku":"22654653806846571876","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078969782317,"sku":"11472575656004346367","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078969815085,"sku":"55335137352721734734","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078969847853,"sku":"13744350253915309411","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"True Royal \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078969978925,"sku":"29280757607786461973","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078970011693,"sku":"32698276678234057942","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/9846292650954065411_2048.jpg?v=1775843653"},{"product_id":"digital-thumb-warrior-shirt","title":"Digital Dominance, Physical Inactivity","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the battlefield’s a screen and the only casualties are egos, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003eThumb Warrior T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a savage, no-mercy flex that celebrates the keyboard gladiators who drop bodies with rapid-fire thumbs and zero remorse.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThumb Warrior T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Charge into the digital fray with the Thumb Warrior T-Shirt—a fierce, unfiltered tee that honors the relentless scrollers, comment-section assassins, and thread-dominating legends who live for the clap-back and thrive on the chaos. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee blends cyber-warrior swagger with everyday comfort, perfect for owning the timeline, crushing trolls, or just flexing that “my thumbs move faster than your feelings” energy louder than a notification ping at 3 a.m.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for marathon doomscrolling, late-night beefs, or layering with attitude. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal vibes, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with your favorite accessories. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your digital dominance with real-world values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, letting you rock the \"Thumb Warrior\" energy with zero distractions and maximum trigger-finger speed.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the ones who live for the ratio, the clap-back kings and queens who turn notifications into body counts, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “I type faster than you think” without opening their mouth. Whether you’re doomscrolling at dawn, owning the comments at midnight, or just flexing that keyboard-warrior soul from the couch, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning heads, sparking beefs, and reminding the internet that some warriors don’t need swords—just thumbs.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Thumb Warrior T-Shirt and let your digital dominance thumb loud and proud! 📱🔥🗡️\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078992228397,"sku":"29489099808845665405","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078992261165,"sku":"10364110744045564269","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078992457773,"sku":"27932358807006419007","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078992490541,"sku":"30222278698230506999","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078992523309,"sku":"11780281994322913484","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078992719917,"sku":"22396674504903222125","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078992752685,"sku":"17015005648872318542","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078992785453,"sku":"59797951967402179937","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078992982061,"sku":"24568281648599605781","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078993014829,"sku":"15216404667003889682","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078993047597,"sku":"31693046818557923750","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078993244205,"sku":"11605975214475171692","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078993276973,"sku":"14907091383972428296","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078993309741,"sku":"89050795773177208551","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078993506349,"sku":"13518046658937494212","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078993539117,"sku":"17762682759863663509","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078993571885,"sku":"27656597727571602927","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078993768493,"sku":"81053784171376739950","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/12908475321374061251_2048.jpg?v=1775843987"},{"product_id":"wipe-till-white-clean-finish-tee","title":"Ass So Clean It Could Run for Office","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the porcelain throne reigns supreme and the quest for perfection never ends, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003eWipe Till White T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a merciless, thumb-up toilet-paper savage that celebrates the sacred grind of getting every last bit spotless.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWipe Till White T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Get downright ruthless with the Wipe Till White T-Shirt—a crude, no-mercy tee that roasts the bathroom struggle with a grinning roll of TP giving the big thumbs-up like it just conquered Mount Ass-more. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee mixes filthy humor with everyday comfort, perfect for dropping truth bombs in the stall, at the bar, or anywhere you wanna remind folks that clean is a lifestyle, not a suggestion.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for casual hangs, long sits, or layering with a smirk. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal vibes, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with your favorite accessories. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every wipe and wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your dirty-mind energy with clean values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, letting you rock the \"Wipe Till White\" mission with zero itch and maximum pride.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the ones who treat every bathroom session like a mission, the toilet-paper warriors who refuse to leave any evidence behind, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “I don’t half-ass cleanliness” without sayin’ a word. Whether you’re post-dump flexin’ in the mirror, roasting friends at the cookout, or just livin’ that pristine life from the couch, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ giggles, and remindin’ the world that white is the only acceptable finish line.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Wipe Till White T-Shirt and let your clean-finish pride shine—because some victories are wiped, not won. 🧻💨😈\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44078995669037,"sku":"15564150410777305424","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44078995701805,"sku":"11706696271424457072","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44078995832877,"sku":"32096850997213391587","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44078995865645,"sku":"15946459892051719201","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44078995931181,"sku":"31769175813602479978","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44078995963949,"sku":"11078107107492052375","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44078996095021,"sku":"10751269765762931938","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44078996127789,"sku":"10889455698594267902","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44078996193325,"sku":"18401500537614495682","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44078996226093,"sku":"47632899917077585209","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44078996357165,"sku":"32109848814434726380","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44078996389933,"sku":"41893454799015611447","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44078996455469,"sku":"71589946951868451299","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44078996488237,"sku":"17506573468529393126","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44078996619309,"sku":"11619753432405745368","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44078996652077,"sku":"15128031716440793838","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078996717613,"sku":"19329805006095015343","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078996750381,"sku":"10095624793223628969","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078996881453,"sku":"86190344424721168169","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44078996914221,"sku":"24933241488593373369","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078996979757,"sku":"20575967605397946043","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078997012525,"sku":"19282720740320553087","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078997143597,"sku":"33263169774538884344","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44078997176365,"sku":"28332820064067696726","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/17102220423732103188_2048.jpg?v=1775844090"},{"product_id":"microwave-grime-vibe-tee","title":"Because Some People Are Just Built Different (And Gross)","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the roasts fly hotter than a fresh microwave burrito and nobody’s safe from the burn, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003eYou Look Like Your Microwave’s Dirty T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a savage, no-mercy gut-punch of a tee that hits with instant regret and zero remorse.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eYou Look Like Your Microwave’s Dirty T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Dish out some nuclear-level shade with the You Look Like Your Microwave’s Dirty T-Shirt—a brutally hilarious roast wrapped in bold, dripping green slime that’ll make ’em check their reflection and their hygiene in one shot. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee blends vicious humor with everyday comfort, perfect for dropping truth bombs, clearing space, and watching jaws hit the floor.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for casual hangs, savage outings, or layering with attitude. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal vibes, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with your favorite accessories. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your savage spirit with solid values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, letting you rock the “You Look Like Your Microwave’s Dirty” energy with zero itch and maximum grin.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the ones who love a good burn, the trash-talk champs who keep it real, and anyone who wants their shirt to deliver the kind of shade that lingers longer than last week’s leftovers. Whether you’re at the bar, the cookout, the gym, or just owning the timeline, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for sparking laughs, starting fights, and reminding everyone that some people really do look like they haven’t wiped the inside since 2019.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the You Look Like Your Microwave’s Dirty T-Shirt and let the roast do the heavy lifting—because sometimes the dirtiest thing in the room ain’t the appliance. 🔥🫠\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44079003795501,"sku":"47425933981780080788","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44079003828269,"sku":"15683795548173647977","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ S","offer_id":44079003893805,"sku":"34649910003525246792","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44079003926573,"sku":"26720921422251760013","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"True Royal \/ S","offer_id":44079003959341,"sku":"24857202276947921010","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44079004024877,"sku":"30490359395879694081","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44079004057645,"sku":"12914674882263145218","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ M","offer_id":44079004123181,"sku":"19697979487044360834","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44079004155949,"sku":"15688197123693851260","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"True Royal \/ M","offer_id":44079004188717,"sku":"35161487027559856406","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44079004254253,"sku":"21929900459602510571","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44079004287021,"sku":"16231107971214361205","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ L","offer_id":44079004352557,"sku":"17315172534606456637","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44079004385325,"sku":"12797711021692587485","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"True Royal \/ L","offer_id":44079004418093,"sku":"31675009694926181196","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44079004483629,"sku":"10844354681215978858","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44079004516397,"sku":"34379591859020069335","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ XL","offer_id":44079004581933,"sku":"22942021898503895128","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44079004614701,"sku":"23468590138201824743","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"True Royal \/ XL","offer_id":44079004647469,"sku":"31080301628066642512","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44079004713005,"sku":"28162313895360122455","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44079004745773,"sku":"32535154498164043151","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ 2XL","offer_id":44079004811309,"sku":"22808803988629272863","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44079004844077,"sku":"14087679250285007221","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"True Royal \/ 2XL","offer_id":44079004876845,"sku":"25593414879900689495","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44079004942381,"sku":"26953651522545615454","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44079004975149,"sku":"26644102090102544259","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ 3XL","offer_id":44079005040685,"sku":"25125179115890969029","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44079005073453,"sku":"39220092905207600639","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"True Royal \/ 3XL","offer_id":44079005106221,"sku":"30092350056391219619","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/9083236765810371680_2048.jpg?v=1775844152"},{"product_id":"taco-juicer-t-shirt-drippin-harder-than-your-ex-s-apology","title":"Drippin’ Harder Than Your Ex’s Apology","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eTaco Juicer T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Get saucy with the Taco Juicer T-Shirt—a bold, unfiltered riot of a tee featuring a grinning taco that's straight-up leaking juicy goodness like it just can't hold it in anymore! This cheeky graphic screams \"I live for the drip\" with zero shame and maximum attitude, perfect for taco Tuesdays that turn into legend status or any day you feel like offending the faint of heart while staying stupidly comfortable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric keeps you cool during heated debates or hot sauce challenges. Fabric blends include:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul dir=\"auto\"\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAsh and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAthletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Retail fit that nails casual swagger—classic crew neckline ready to rock under a flannel or solo for peak \"fuck around and find out\" vibes. Ribbed knit collars, tapered shoulders, and dual side seams lock in that sharp shape wash after wash, no saggin' allowed.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly made by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally with humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Fair Labor Association certified and Platinum WRAP—this tee brings the bold while backing solid ethics.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e Tear-away label means zero itch, so you can focus on the stares, the giggles, and the \"where the hell did you get that?\" questions without distraction.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Tailored for the fearless souls who double down on the mess, embrace the chaos, and wear their love for all things drippy and delicious like a badge of honor. Whether you're crushing tacos, starting food fights, or just living unapologetically loud, this soft, high-quality tee is your new go-to for turning heads and sparking chaos.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Taco Juicer T-Shirt and let that juicy energy flow—because life's too short for dry shirts! 🌮💦\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44614260260909,"sku":"12572204209297705616","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ S","offer_id":44614260293677,"sku":"27535102311498876187","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44614260326445,"sku":"11845893514188916929","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44820222771245,"sku":"20771860050102832950","price":31.02,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44614260359213,"sku":"88050356205996262585","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ M","offer_id":44614260391981,"sku":"12901098611767705259","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44614260424749,"sku":"23408328522725112143","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44820222804013,"sku":"17999120172398476159","price":31.02,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44614260457517,"sku":"29149108372744794455","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ L","offer_id":44614260490285,"sku":"26644244595925467350","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44614260523053,"sku":"83103196295495303168","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44820222836781,"sku":"10676482674125026721","price":31.02,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44614260555821,"sku":"50763030772996327908","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44614260588589,"sku":"26689406722951270787","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44614260621357,"sku":"22575313419552868655","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44820222869549,"sku":"32726474312974612659","price":31.02,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44614260654125,"sku":"21075034067873981630","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44614260686893,"sku":"18956244633504056626","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44614260719661,"sku":"21188305214665390445","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44820222902317,"sku":"26334383664075513085","price":34.41,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44614260752429,"sku":"69509936781255661582","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44614260785197,"sku":"33287303207985281216","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44614260817965,"sku":"27759330024704023281","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44820222935085,"sku":"22669316395387866988","price":37.86,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/17400576289153084789_2048.jpg?v=1775832278"},{"product_id":"buddha-mandala-long-sleeve-tee-chest-full-of-peace-back-full-of-cosmic-chaos","title":"Chest Full of Peace, Back Full of Cosmic Chaos","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the energy quiets down just enough to hear your own damn thoughts, High in the Pines brings you the \u003cstrong\u003eBuddha Mandala Long Sleeve Tee\u003c\/strong\u003e—front-loaded with calm Buddha wisdom and a full-back mandala explosion that turns every walk into a moving meditation (with a side of subtle flex).\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuddha Mandala Long Sleeve Tee\u003c\/strong\u003e Channel inner peace on the front and cosmic geometry on the back with the Buddha Mandala Long Sleeve Tee—featuring a serene, minimalist Buddha silhouette right across the chest for that instant zen glow-up, while the intricate, mind-bending mandala sprawls across the entire back like sacred street art you can wear. This long-sleeve is built for the yogis who meditate in the morning and raise hell by night, the seekers who want their shirt to say “namaste” up front and “look deeper” around back—perfect for flow sessions, trail hikes, coffee runs, or just vibing like you’ve already figured out the universe.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m² for the body), with long sleeves made for layering or wearing solo when the mountain air bites. Lightweight, breathable, and buttery soft—ideal for stretching, sitting still, or pretending you’re enlightened while scrolling memes. Fabric blends include:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul dir=\"auto\"\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAsh and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAthletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Retail fit with extra length in the sleeves and body for that effortless draped look—classic crew neck up front keeps it clean and versatile, while the full-back print makes every turn-around a statement. Ribbed knit cuffs and collar lock it in, tapered shoulders add shape, and dual side seams keep everything crisp through every sun salutation and late-night bonfire.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly made by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally with humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Fair Labor Association certified and Platinum WRAP—this long-sleeve pairs mindful design with real-world integrity.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e Tear-away label means no itchy distractions—just pure comfort so you can stay focused on your breath, your flow, or whatever higher plane you’re chasing today.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Made for the Boise locals who hit the mat at sunrise, the wanderers who need a shirt that works from studio to dive bar, and anyone who wants front-facing calm with back-of-the-shirt depth. Whether you’re manifesting good vibes, crushing yoga flows, or just wearing peace like armor, this soft, high-quality long-sleeve is your all-day companion for looking centered while secretly running the show.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Buddha Mandala Long Sleeve Tee—Buddha up front to keep the peace, mandala on back to blow minds—and let that balanced energy radiate from every angle. 🧘‍♂️✨\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44614285066285,"sku":"29626152457644697245","price":31.67,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44614285099053,"sku":"29499016858989990013","price":31.67,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44614285131821,"sku":"98698872088710600082","price":31.67,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44614285164589,"sku":"75557830366946166276","price":31.67,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44614285197357,"sku":"14625062104383997472","price":31.67,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44614285230125,"sku":"10578830544752951973","price":31.67,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44614285262893,"sku":"14599414427664618121","price":31.67,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44614285295661,"sku":"25207097267680162798","price":31.67,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44614285328429,"sku":"20722351264977414515","price":34.3,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44614285361197,"sku":"24801361167968708622","price":34.3,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44614285393965,"sku":"25807028291901536901","price":37.1,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44614285426733,"sku":"17320768569823614894","price":37.1,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/7777567904907460193_2048.jpg?v=1774637773"},{"product_id":"psychedelic-buddha-long-sleeve-tee-meditate-like-it-s-3-a-m-at-the-rave","title":"Meditate Like It’s 3 A.M. at the Rave","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the vibes stay electric and the designs hit like a lightning bolt wrapped in lotus petals, here’s your updated \u003cstrong\u003ePsychedelic Buddha Long Sleeve Tee\u003c\/strong\u003e description with every trace of location scrubbed clean—no Boise, no foothills, no specifics—just pure, unfiltered cosmic energy for wherever the hell you’re manifesting it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePsychedelic Buddha Long Sleeve Tee\u003c\/strong\u003e Drop into deep zen with a side of full-on visual overload on the \u003cstrong\u003ePsychedelic Buddha Long Sleeve Tee\u003c\/strong\u003e—featuring a hypnotic, glowing Buddha head front and center, constructed from wild, tangled neon threads in electric pink, cyan, and red that swirl and pulse like they’re alive and breathing. This ain’t your standard meditation gear; it’s for the late-night seekers chasing enlightenment at 3 a.m., the yogis who blast trippy beats during savasana, and anyone fearless enough to wear sacred geometry that looks like it escaped a black-light rave. Long sleeves keep you wrapped in comfort while the design keeps every eye locked and wondering what kinda higher plane you’re operating on.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m² for the body), with long sleeves built for layering under hoodies or rocking solo when the air turns crisp. Lightweight, breathable, and buttery soft—perfect for flow sessions, stargazing deep dives, or just zoning out harder than most people dream. Fabric blends include:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul dir=\"auto\"\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAsh and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAthletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Retail fit with extra length in the sleeves and body for that effortless, draped look—classic crew neck keeps the neon Buddha front-and-center, while the chaotic lines wrap just enough to feel alive without stealing the show. Ribbed knit cuffs and collar lock it in, tapered shoulders add shape, and dual side seams hold the form through every breathwork blast and midnight wander.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly made by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally with humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Fair Labor Association certified and Platinum WRAP—this long-sleeve pairs psychedelic soul with real-deal integrity.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e Tear-away label means no itchy distractions—just pure comfort so you can stay lost in the pattern (or your own headspace) without a single interruption.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Tailored for the weirdos who meditate at dawn, chase altered states on the weekends, and want their clothing to match the chaos inside their skull when the lights drop low. Whether you’re flowing through sun salutations, tripping through the night, or just flexing higher consciousness wherever life takes you, this soft, high-quality long-sleeve is your all-day (or all-night) companion for radiating peace that’s anything but tame.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Psychedelic Buddha Long Sleeve Tee and let those neon mandala vibes radiate—because enlightenment doesn’t have to whisper… sometimes it glows like a motherfucker. 🧘‍♂️🌈⚡\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44614369804333,"sku":"32925417719152802830","price":24.45,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44614369837101,"sku":"19616041101627892836","price":24.45,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ S","offer_id":44614369869869,"sku":"26874895757964360993","price":24.45,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44614369902637,"sku":"91958415004052002141","price":24.45,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44614369935405,"sku":"29048609766974740557","price":24.45,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ M","offer_id":44614369968173,"sku":"33761493283388593715","price":24.45,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44614370000941,"sku":"23872076935505968488","price":24.45,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44614370033709,"sku":"93724858677392292318","price":24.45,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ L","offer_id":44614370066477,"sku":"17231331888512670153","price":24.45,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44614370099245,"sku":"18968078367944215580","price":24.45,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44614370132013,"sku":"97249773716614856586","price":24.45,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ XL","offer_id":44614370164781,"sku":"14495989492323288045","price":24.45,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44614370197549,"sku":"17904413916679923498","price":27.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44614370230317,"sku":"55566626319949854619","price":27.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ 2XL","offer_id":44614370263085,"sku":"21297119758776731995","price":27.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44614370295853,"sku":"18840419960878209930","price":29.88,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ 3XL","offer_id":44614370328621,"sku":"28060046548783597248","price":29.88,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44614370361389,"sku":"23719925011485342482","price":29.88,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/2204984147072544885_2048.jpg?v=1774438193"},{"product_id":"if-you-build-it-they-will-come-t-shirt-build-it-heavy-they-ll-come-hungry","title":"Build It Heavy, They’ll Come Hungry","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the iron clangs louder than a chainsaw and the gains don’t come with apologies, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eIf You Build It They Will Come T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a pink-powered, swole-as-hell tribute to every woman who’s ever racked up plates and turned heads doing it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIf You Build It They Will Come T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Say it with gains and zero subtlety on the \u003cstrong\u003eIf You Build It They Will Come T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—featuring a badass, thick-thighed powerlifter chick mid-squat with a barbell that could bench-press your excuses, all wrapped in electric pink script that screams “build the body, watch the world show up.” This tee is for the queens who live by progressive overload, the gym rats who know the squat rack is sacred ground, and anyone who wants to flex that hard work pays off in curves, confidence, and straight-up magnetism. Short-sleeve classic cut, bold graphic front and center—perfect for leg day, cheat day, or just reminding the world that strong looks damn good in pink.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric keeps you cool while you crush reps or crush post-workout tacos. Fabric blends include:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul dir=\"auto\"\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAsh and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAthletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Retail fit that hugs the gains without squeezing the life out of ’em—classic crew neckline pairs killer with sports bras, hoodies, or nothing but attitude. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders keep the shape sharp, while dual side seams lock it in through every PR and every pump.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP—this tee matches your iron-clad work ethic with solid values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e Tear-away label eliminates itch so you can focus on the burn, not the scratch—rock that “If You Build It” energy with zero distractions.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the lifters who squat deeper than their doubts, the women who build bodies that command attention, and everyone who knows the best revenge is looking unstoppable. Whether you’re repping out in the gym, flexing at brunch, or just living proof that hard work draws a crowd, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning heads, sparking envy, and saying “they came… because I built.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eIf You Build It They Will Come T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let ’em stare—because when the gains speak, the world listens. 💪🌸\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44614381338669,"sku":"21665013866543063317","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44614381371437,"sku":"14474289460640363936","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44614381404205,"sku":"56727563073003160788","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44614381436973,"sku":"15488713190355505578","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44614381469741,"sku":"58647310562077953070","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44614381502509,"sku":"29467067316494630052","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44614381535277,"sku":"12317769686873005558","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44614381568045,"sku":"18146749552994386769","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44614381600813,"sku":"21414538578874834977","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44614381633581,"sku":"10874783405803609436","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44614381666349,"sku":"15946306909137125708","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44614381699117,"sku":"28320385193509556059","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/744226417904860512_2048.jpg?v=1775831674"},{"product_id":"starry-night-mountain-trip-t-shirt-because-regular-night-skies-are-for-amateurs","title":"Because Regular Night Skies Are for Amateurs","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the night sky melts into pure cosmic chaos and the vibes get trippier than a fever dream, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eStarry Night Mountain Trip T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a swirling, mind-bending masterpiece that turns every glance upward into a full-on LSD-fueled stare-down.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eStarry Night Mountain Trip T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Get lost in the swirl with the \u003cstrong\u003eStarry Night Mountain Trip T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a psychedelic reimagining of Van Gogh’s wildest night, where jagged mountain peaks twist and bleed into a vortex of electric stars, glowing nebulae, and infinite swirling skies that pull you deeper the longer you stare. Down in the bottom right, delicate cursive whispers “get lost” like it knows exactly where you’re headed. This tee is for the dreamers who chase horizons, the night owls who see galaxies in every shadow, and anyone who wants to wear a portal to the infinite on their chest. Classic unisex fit, soft as a hallucination, and printed to last through every late-night wander and existential scroll.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric feels like your favorite broken-in tee right out the box—perfect for layering under flannels when the night air bites or rocking solo on those endless summer drives. Fabric blends include:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul dir=\"auto\"\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAsh and Heather Prism colors: 99% cotton, 1% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAthletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Retail fit that nails casual and semi-formal vibes—classic crew neckline pairs seamless with whatever cosmic mood you’re in. Ribbed knit collars bolster shaping, tapered shoulders keep it sharp over time, and dual side seams hold the shape wash after wash so the stars stay swirling.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally with humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP—this tee brings psychedelic soul with real-deal integrity.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e Tear-away label minimizes irritation, letting you stay lost in the trip without any scratchy distractions.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the stargazers who see patterns in the chaos, the wanderers who chase the edge of reality, and anyone who wants their shirt to feel like stepping into a Van Gogh fever dream. Whether you’re road-tripping under the real sky, zoning out at 3 a.m., or just flexing higher consciousness wherever life takes you, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning every moment into a portal.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eStarry Night Mountain Trip T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let the stars pull you in—because sometimes getting lost is the only way to find yourself. 🌌✨\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44627420020781,"sku":"27280612796137678623","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44627420053549,"sku":"66739045295489490590","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44627420086317,"sku":"32481459990921767733","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44627420119085,"sku":"11897686339797912659","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44627420151853,"sku":"23746740242957754024","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44627420184621,"sku":"31608024183762320631","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44627420217389,"sku":"12893350569333277386","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44627420250157,"sku":"66297030648206461361","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44627420282925,"sku":"14876257745843718557","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44627420315693,"sku":"33334238390571072643","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44627420348461,"sku":"33722518132513739193","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44627420381229,"sku":"28923471842123699175","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44627420413997,"sku":"18215216096779007242","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44627420446765,"sku":"18814668213760907078","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44627420479533,"sku":"22841079306290075012","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44627420512301,"sku":"30165758560936180753","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44627420545069,"sku":"29595120664637759943","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44627420577837,"sku":"58262096052392436716","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44627420610605,"sku":"18658030706881845617","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44627420643373,"sku":"22281703605788607240","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44627420676141,"sku":"32335030449911901954","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44627420708909,"sku":"23568368478146790505","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44627420741677,"sku":"31013648013868855506","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44627420774445,"sku":"10037958054443807483","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/grok-image-55264e9e-cbf5-4da5-949b-f0b984fd36cf.jpg?v=1780397141"},{"product_id":"save-animals-eat-souls-t-shirt-saving-the-beasts-feasting-on-the-faithless","title":"Saving the Beasts, Feasting on the Faithless","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the flames crackle like bad decisions and the little devils throw the best parties in hell, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003eSave Animals Eat Souls T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a cheeky, fire-kissed riot that saves the critters while roasting souls with zero remorse and maximum sin.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSave Animals Eat Souls T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Say it with pitchforks and a straight face on the \u003cstrong\u003eSave Animals Eat Souls T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—three chubby, gleeful baby devils jam on a glowing lava-hot platform, capes flapping, tiny horns shining, pitchforks raised like they’re toasting marshmallows while the bold, blazing command “Save Animals Eat Souls” scorches across the bottom like a commandment straight from the pit. This tee is for the plant-powered rebels, the vegan badasses, the ones who spare every animal and still collect souls like it’s happy hour in the underworld—perfect for casual hangs, protest streets, or just flexing that savage compassion louder than the grill you’re boycotting.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the person who save the animals, devour the souls, and laugh at the hypocrisy—whether you’re crushing workouts, owning the streets, or just reminding the world that compassion comes with a side of eternal damnation. This soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning heads, sparking debates, and proving that sometimes the hottest take is the one you wear loud and proud.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eSave Animals Eat Souls T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let the little devils do the jamming—because saving the planet never looked so damn deliciously wicked.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44627549782061,"sku":"48135906070009255043","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44627549814829,"sku":"23592944973110629182","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44627549880365,"sku":"24063759788183209243","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44627549913133,"sku":"97107228211559330378","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44627549978669,"sku":"16063523419165625200","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44627550011437,"sku":"14642424503210869480","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44627550076973,"sku":"91906886070641195346","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44627550109741,"sku":"14144767150742506237","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44627550175277,"sku":"35755121868940429376","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44627550208045,"sku":"24401780610464871973","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44627550273581,"sku":"13920844842675078063","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44627550306349,"sku":"22329559827239478481","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/2705934608185806503_2048.jpg?v=1775840054"},{"product_id":"g3t-l05t-peak-trip-t-shirt-the-sky-said-hold-my-molecules","title":"The Sky Said “Hold My Molecules”","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the trip peaks like a freight train and the night sky turns into pure electric soup, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eG3t L05t (Peak Trip) T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a hyper-blotchy, 1000x LSD mountain meltdown that drags you straight to the edge and dares you not to jump.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eG3t L05t (Peak Trip) T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Dissolve into the chaos with the \u003cstrong\u003eG3t L05t (Peak Trip) T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a jagged mountain ridge lined with dense, swaying trees up front seamlessly bleeds into a wildly blotchy, swirling starry night sky exploding with neon streaks, glowing orbs, chaotic star trails, and color bursts that scream “this is the absolute peak, good luck coming down.” Down in the bottom right corner, glitchy, distorted “g3t l05t” text flickers like the last signal before everything unravels. This tee is for the psychonauts who chase the absolute top of the wave, the night wanderers who see infinity in every pixelated star, and anyone who wants to wear a full-blown ego-shatter portal on their chest. Classic unisex fit, soft as melting reality, and printed to last through every comedown, flashback, and “holy shit what was that” moment.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the seekers who ride the absolute peak, the trippers who live for the blotchy unknown, and anyone who wants their shirt to feel like stepping off the cliff into infinite freefall. Whether you’re hiking under real stars, zoning out at 3 a.m., or just flexing that “I’ve seen things you wouldn’t believe” energy, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning every moment into an open invitation to vanish.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eG3t L05t (Peak Trip) T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let the sky swallow you whole—because sometimes the best view is the one that makes you forget your own name. 🌌✨\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44629149057069,"sku":"24604527590193017270","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44629149089837,"sku":"15803913726210526149","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44629149122605,"sku":"11077874004962243661","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44629149155373,"sku":"10690621803874093542","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44629149188141,"sku":"23277979011895361502","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44629149220909,"sku":"26867922208619084264","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44629149253677,"sku":"26788502214242531038","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44629149286445,"sku":"43308697687983761493","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44629149319213,"sku":"22585884872323153274","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44629149351981,"sku":"21314244969357259196","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44629149384749,"sku":"25960697642281347130","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44629149417517,"sku":"21787540002993707695","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44629149450285,"sku":"26346476683964390197","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44629149483053,"sku":"18419053120783227365","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44629149515821,"sku":"28306308648379150409","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44629149548589,"sku":"31311379107681786532","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44629149581357,"sku":"22249858627259193841","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44629149614125,"sku":"13760202507724065506","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44629149646893,"sku":"30812923407178487168","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44629149679661,"sku":"16247921948656934304","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44629149712429,"sku":"30371280935383639508","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44629149745197,"sku":"11788921051670667795","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44629149777965,"sku":"12619505121928966564","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44629149810733,"sku":"13737506832495983430","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/9138212313198990409_2048.jpg?v=1775831619"},{"product_id":"observers-observing-observers-t-shirt-stars-stripes-surveillance-vibes","title":"Stars, Stripes \u0026 Surveillance Vibes","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the stares loop back on themselves and the vibes get meta as hell, High in the Pines drops the Observers Observing Observers T-Shirt—a brain-bending, infinite-mirror mind-twist that turns every glance into a hall of echoes and every wearer into the watched watching the watchers.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eObservers Observing Observers T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eLayer up the mind-bend with the \u003cstrong\u003eObservers Observing Observers T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a hypnotic stack of repeating “OBSERVERS OBSERVING OBSERVERS” in bold, patriotic red, crisp white, and electric blue outlines that pulse like they’re watching the watchers watch the watchers, all on a black backdrop that makes the colors pop harder than a Fourth of July finale. This tee is for the deep-divers who notice everything, the quiet patriots who observe the chaos while everyone else is busy being part of it, and anyone who wants to wear “I see you seeing me seeing you” energy with a side of stars-and-stripes swagger. Classic unisex fit, soft as hell, and printed to last through every parade, protest, or late-night people-watching session.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric feels like your favorite broken-in tee right out the box—perfect for summer BBQs, chill hangs, or layering when the night gets cool. Fabric blends include:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul dir=\"auto\"\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAsh and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAthletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Retail fit that nails casual and semi-formal vibes—classic crew neckline pairs seamless with whatever flag you’re flying today. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders keep the shape sharp, while dual side seams hold it together through every salute, stare-down, and existential loop.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally with humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP—this tee brings bold, red-white-and-blue energy with real-deal values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e Tear-away label means zero itch, so you can stay locked in the observation spiral (or the fireworks) without distractions.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the over-thinkers who watch the room, the patriots who notice the noticing, and anyone who wants their shirt to do the talking while they do the seeing—red, white, and blue edition. Whether you’re grilling with the crew, scrolling in silence, or just vibing in plain sight, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning passive observation into pure, unapologetic presence with a patriotic punch.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eObservers Observing Observers T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let the recursion glow in freedom colors—because sometimes the best way to be seen is to look like you’re already watching yourself watch them watch you watch the land of the free. 🇺🇸👀🔄\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44629150531629,"sku":"17090446575773757222","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44629150564397,"sku":"29536623011427589945","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44629150629933,"sku":"57261981702954630822","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44629150662701,"sku":"20908369765274696804","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44629150728237,"sku":"19374735970880706064","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44629150761005,"sku":"43450988687803836593","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44629150826541,"sku":"27304968283455520145","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44629150859309,"sku":"12278165356281783629","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44629150924845,"sku":"33106494045944373990","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44629150957613,"sku":"10509345191661439861","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44629150990381,"sku":"76957873530374129138","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44629151023149,"sku":"36552647769884699700","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/17457734737741391729_2048.jpg?v=1775832749"},{"product_id":"deez-nutz-tee","title":"Deez Nutz Tee","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDeez Nutz Tee\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eSome things in life just need to be said out loud — on a shirt, in public, without apology. This is one of those things.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eBorn somewhere deep in the pines where the air is clean and nobody takes themselves too seriously, the Deez Nutz Tee is exactly what it looks like — and that's the whole point. Bold enough to start a conversation and guaranteed to make at least one person do a double take in the checkout line.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eThis ain't a subtle brand. Never was. If you're looking for polished and proper, keep scrolling. But if you've got the kind of humor that doesn't need a filter and the confidence to back it up — welcome home.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight breathable fabric feels like your favorite broken-in tee right out the box — ideal for active days, lazy days, or layering when the vibes get chilly.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eFabric blends vary by color:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul class=\"[li_\u0026amp;]:mb-0 [li_\u0026amp;]:mt-1 [li_\u0026amp;]:gap-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ul]:pb-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ol]:pb-1 list-disc flex flex-col gap-1 pl-8 mb-3\"\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eAsh and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eHeather and Solid Blend: 52% cotton, 48% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eAthletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFunny graphic tee | Outdoor humor | Gift for him | Edgy unisex shirt\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44629152399405,"sku":"32724263110779815272","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44629152432173,"sku":"11451984074837414670","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44629152464941,"sku":"18533937281883307010","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44629152497709,"sku":"19910976912185303224","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44629152530477,"sku":"22985718259189189769","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44629152563245,"sku":"33594387978455967020","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44629152596013,"sku":"31310329644411984401","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44629152628781,"sku":"92732803529005415790","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44629152661549,"sku":"28988797330516516874","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44629152694317,"sku":"29750472401320491029","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44629152727085,"sku":"48934854089435493231","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44629152759853,"sku":"27115034952070371487","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44629152792621,"sku":"22840675136115379011","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44629152825389,"sku":"21391567979819019664","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44629152858157,"sku":"10355252220204585921","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44629152890925,"sku":"18480206815831613176","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44629152923693,"sku":"12496900749696359936","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44629152956461,"sku":"12823106364846431516","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44629152989229,"sku":"17946609681462596381","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44629153021997,"sku":"30379283728140252295","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44629153054765,"sku":"15180556636019488630","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44629153087533,"sku":"14475474499910656291","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44629153120301,"sku":"91053128262177395424","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44629153153069,"sku":"14860097039810190521","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44629153185837,"sku":"20643010686027968439","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44629153218605,"sku":"17739279886440223809","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44629153251373,"sku":"14965268253951193796","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44629153284141,"sku":"25459595792934720480","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44629153316909,"sku":"24510287677628087597","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44629153349677,"sku":"20893812292399414647","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/grok-image-14a85d9e-e3dc-41c6-baea-6f80fc53164c.jpg?v=1780397623"},{"product_id":"awaken-within-t-shirt-sit-still-burn-bright-wake-the-fuck-up","title":"Sit Still, Burn Bright, Wake the Fuck Up","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the inner light flickers neon and the soul finally stops scrollin’, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eAwaken Within T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a glowing, glitchy reminder that the real trip starts when you quit lookin’ outside.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eAwaken Within T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Wake the fuck up with the \u003cstrong\u003eAwaken Within T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a radiant Buddha silhouette sits in perfect stillness, crowned with electric pink and cyan flames that bleed into the void, while bold, dripping “Awaken” arches above and “Within” flows beneath in hot magenta cursive like it’s whispering straight to your third eye. This tee is for the meditators who still curse in traffic, the seekers who’ve seen the void and laughed, and anyone ready to wear quiet rebellion louder than a festival drop. Classic unisex fit, soft as enlightenment, and printed to last through every sunrise salutation and midnight existential scroll.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the ones who’ve sat in silence long enough to hear the roar inside, the yogis who chase awakening without losing the edge, and anyone who wants their shirt to glow like the crown chakra finally cracked open. Whether you’re flowing through sun salutations, zoning out under real stars, or just flexing that “I’ve been places inside my head you can’t pronounce” energy, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for radiating peace that’s anything but boring.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eAwaken Within T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let the inner fire show—because the real glow-up happens when you stop lookin’ for it out there. 🧘‍♂️🌈🔥\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44635705245741,"sku":"18483759824701015523","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44635705278509,"sku":"13793043700756846476","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44635705311277,"sku":"33030371733528395796","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44635705344045,"sku":"30697316493642456413","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44635705376813,"sku":"81734883375154152911","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44635705409581,"sku":"13217738188208829020","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44635705442349,"sku":"30110289226323410931","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44635705475117,"sku":"76980710748740108491","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44635705507885,"sku":"25547603271851219112","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44635705540653,"sku":"40497167757421102826","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44635705573421,"sku":"12922614949436298902","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44635705606189,"sku":"11146739864100166055","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44635705638957,"sku":"12861891155003096728","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44635705671725,"sku":"19427464872797579282","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44635705704493,"sku":"33299936882235873055","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44635705737261,"sku":"72771763022339194220","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635705770029,"sku":"71235076630371122268","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635705802797,"sku":"18297034290960222755","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635705835565,"sku":"11507508470192914939","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635705868333,"sku":"30589658815224383571","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635705901101,"sku":"68191816048907001392","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635705933869,"sku":"80721225195449860796","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635705966637,"sku":"73888174517471705732","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635705999405,"sku":"28688471330433922021","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/grok-image-de5c6305-764b-4725-958b-bb943f61ddb6.jpg?v=1780397462"},{"product_id":"degenerating-social-structures-t-shirt-when-the-mycelium-reclaims-the-timeline","title":"When the Mycelium Reclaims the Timeline","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the mushrooms whisper secrets and the old structures crumble like wet cardboard, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eDegenerating Social Structures T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a surreal, spore-dusted fever dream that watches the whole damn system melt under a canopy of glowing red caps.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDegenerating Social Structures T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Watch it all dissolve with the \u003cstrong\u003eDegenerating Social Structures T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a floating island of massive, bioluminescent Amanita muscaria mushrooms towers in psychedelic glory, caps dripping with otherworldly light, roots twisting through moss and decay while the bold, dripping command “Degenerating Social Structures” scorches across the bottom like graffiti from the mycelium network itself. This tee is for the chaos agents, the late-night philosophers, the ones who see the cracks in the matrix and giggle while the whole thing rots—perfect for casual hangs, underground shows, or just flexing that “I’m here for the collapse” energy louder than a chainsaw in the forest.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the degenerates who watch empires rot with a grin, the mushroom mystics who know the real power’s underground, and anyone who wants their shirt to look like the last broadcast from a collapsing civilization. Whether you’re vibing at the bonfire, scrolling through the end times, or just flexing that “let it all burn” attitude, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning heads, sparking stares, and reminding the world that sometimes the best view is the one where everything falls apart beautifully.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eDegenerating Social Structures T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let the mushrooms do the talking—because when the old world crumbles, the fun really begins. 🍄🌑🔥\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44635774320685,"sku":"25755328472875299722","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44635774353453,"sku":"30410924773656863566","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44635774386221,"sku":"96459109620715287307","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44635774418989,"sku":"30991734182895164414","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44635774451757,"sku":"13929592319437823415","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44635774484525,"sku":"98143908003352708657","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44635774517293,"sku":"56843090646593251834","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44635774550061,"sku":"23314370371344290021","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44635774582829,"sku":"23762044186670034573","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44635774615597,"sku":"16117094917222781966","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44635774648365,"sku":"14818720685263795258","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44635774681133,"sku":"30313350238558429883","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44635774713901,"sku":"25574396974145443041","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44635774746669,"sku":"60020764562473987760","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44635774779437,"sku":"13410395037155085827","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44635774812205,"sku":"18019434648297855203","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635774844973,"sku":"19485266342057029190","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635774877741,"sku":"32126907567672244495","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635774910509,"sku":"31719543656787184755","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635774943277,"sku":"23517955477999099193","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635774976045,"sku":"11095897521690116467","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635775008813,"sku":"26263050085521598529","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635775041581,"sku":"13220460365983466954","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635775074349,"sku":"31669926010034046527","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/3014483035354503529_2048.jpg?v=1775831434"},{"product_id":"get-lost-t-shirt-lost-in-the-best-way-possible","title":"Lost in the Best Way Possible","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the trail fades and the soul finds its own damn way, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eGet Lost T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a bold, sunset-drenched call to vanish into the mountains and never look back.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eGet Lost T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Chase the horizon with the \u003cstrong\u003eGet Lost T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a majestic mountain peak rises sharp against a blazing orange-to-blue sunset sky, stars already punching through the twilight while dense pine forests blanket the lower slopes, all crowned by massive, unapologetic “GET LOST” text that hits like a dare you can’t refuse. This tee is for the wanderers who ditch the map, the ones who find peace in the unknown, and anyone who wants to wear “fuck it, I’m gone” energy louder than a chainsaw revving in the backcountry. Classic unisex fit, soft as a campfire blanket, and printed to last through every off-grid adventure and late-night “where the hell am I” story.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the trailblazers who disappear on purpose, the ones who trade WiFi for wilderness, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “I’m not lost, I’m exactly where I wanna be.” Whether you’re hiking at dawn, road-tripping till the gas runs dry, or just flexing that free-spirit energy from the couch, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning every day into an invitation to vanish.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eGet Lost T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let the mountains swallow you whole—because sometimes the best destination is nowhere at all. 🏔️🌅✨\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44635826520109,"sku":"12087103696419837366","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44635826552877,"sku":"15445126938528204458","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44635826585645,"sku":"13446984101661798168","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44635826618413,"sku":"78677820202639457180","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44635826651181,"sku":"54372099396727615435","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44635826683949,"sku":"21885959602021700746","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44635826716717,"sku":"31797171474114065817","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44635826749485,"sku":"28460752129917241266","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635826782253,"sku":"21324353908703038270","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635826815021,"sku":"18335608338535538012","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635826847789,"sku":"82995310662198651602","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635826880557,"sku":"23364198362651879554","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/12852392900862635146_2048.jpg?v=1775832162"},{"product_id":"trippin-t-shirt-because-some-nights-the-sky-steals-the-show","title":"Because Some Nights the Sky Steals the Show","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the road never ends and the night sky swirls like a bad decision you’ll never regret, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eTrippin’ T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a starry-eyed, van-life fever dream that fuses Van Gogh’s madness with the open highway and says “fuck it, let’s go nowhere fast.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eTrippin’ T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Hit the gas and lose your damn mind with the \u003cstrong\u003eTrippin’ T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a rugged RV camper sits parked under a blazing, swirling starry night sky straight out of a psychedelic Van Gogh remix, bold white-capped waves of blue and gold crashing overhead while “Trippin’” slams across the top in gritty, road-worn letters like it’s been spray-painted on the side of the van itself. This tee is for the nomads who live out of duffels, the ones who chase sunsets instead of deadlines, and anyone who wants to wear “I’m not lost, I’m just trippin’” energy louder than a diesel engine at 3 a.m. Classic unisex fit, soft as a sleeping bag, and printed to last through every mile marker and questionable campsite.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the road warriors who sleep in parking lots, the dreamers who chase horizons instead of happiness, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “I’m trippin’ and I ain’t sorry.” Whether you’re parked under real stars, road-trippin’ till the tank’s dry, or just flexing that free-spirit wanderlust from the couch, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning every day into an open invitation to disappear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eTrippin’ T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let the stars spin—because sometimes the best destination is wherever the hell the van takes you. 🚐🌌✨\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44635849457709,"sku":"13370557193349136259","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44635849490477,"sku":"36417484900317497038","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44635849523245,"sku":"26995378459025142364","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44635849556013,"sku":"29367204697665052725","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635849588781,"sku":"32078478251631144218","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635849621549,"sku":"13523049787869916803","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/8167132937576791977_2048.jpg?v=1775831749"},{"product_id":"nutzer-t-shirt-chonky-cheeks-zero-fucks-maximum-nuts","title":"Chonky Cheeks, Zero Fucks, Maximum Nuts","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the squirrels hoard more than just acorns and the jokes land low enough to make the trees blush, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003eNutzer T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a fuzzy, filthy little bastard that turns “nut enthusiast” into high art and zero shame.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNutzer T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Say it with cheeks full and zero regrets on the \u003cstrong\u003eNutzer T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a chonky squirrel stares straight ahead with big, unblinking eyes, paws crammed with overflowing nuts, cheeks ballooned like he’s smuggling the whole damn forest, while bold, dripping “NUTZER” crowns the chaos like a crown you never asked for but definitely deserve. This tee is for the nut-hoardin’ degenerates, the snack-attack legends, the ones who live by “if it fits, it ships… straight to my face”—perfect for casual hangs, barbecues where everyone’s judging your plate, or just flexing that “I’m not addicted, I’m committed” energy louder than a nutcracker at Christmas.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the snack fiends who treat nuts like currency, the cheek-stuffers who live life one handful at a time, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “yeah, I’m that guy” without saying a word. Whether you’re chillin’ with the crew, raiding the pantry at 3 a.m., or just owning the day with unapologetic nut lust, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning heads, sparking laughs, and proving that some addictions look adorable in cartoon form.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eNutzer T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let your inner squirrel run wild—because sometimes the best way to live is with your cheeks full and your standards empty. 🐿️🥜\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44635865743405,"sku":"13183739577841262260","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44635865776173,"sku":"80978610602160581364","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44635865808941,"sku":"31358723422142159424","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44635865841709,"sku":"22994558967650705418","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44635865874477,"sku":"27753640460939496049","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44635865907245,"sku":"12363437922679941897","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44635865940013,"sku":"18595806571480583505","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44635865972781,"sku":"12807806050077072775","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44635866005549,"sku":"19166085302791229492","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44635866038317,"sku":"60406601887703284801","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44635866071085,"sku":"25903803127257908582","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44635866103853,"sku":"12576150124395404765","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635866136621,"sku":"39813113469277614740","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635866169389,"sku":"64633619514540900007","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635866202157,"sku":"33671168753133614921","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635866234925,"sku":"30422766557869099502","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635866267693,"sku":"27712571199501604036","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635866300461,"sku":"11617356059721822637","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/12500963108543336593_2048.jpg?v=1775831949"},{"product_id":"green-is-good-t-shirt-moss-majesty-noise-nonsense","title":"Moss \u0026 Majesty \u003e Noise \u0026 Nonsense","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eThis isn't a debate. It never was.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eGreen is the color of the trees you'd rather be standing in, the smoke you'd rather be breathing, and the flag of every person who figured out what actually matters in life. The Green Is Better tee doesn't explain itself because it doesn't have to. You already know. That's why you're still reading.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eSome things just hit different when they're green. Everything, actually.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric feels like your favorite broken-in tee right out the box — ideal for active days, lazy days, or layering when the vibes get chilly.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal leading-[1.7]\"\u003eFabric blends vary by color:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul class=\"[li_\u0026amp;]:mb-0 [li_\u0026amp;]:mt-1 [li_\u0026amp;]:gap-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ul]:pb-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ol]:pb-1 list-disc flex flex-col gap-1 pl-8 mb-3\"\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eAsh and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eHeather and Solid Blend: 52% cotton, 48% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eAthletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e Green Is Better T-Shirt | Funny Weed Humor | High in the Pines\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44635899166765,"sku":"15030193694781153982","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44635899199533,"sku":"13297353884872591974","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44635899232301,"sku":"32981433573725832472","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44635899265069,"sku":"84019997302535790857","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635899297837,"sku":"10446484383007075890","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635899330605,"sku":"32929417550179048439","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/16209461061633913731_2048.jpg?v=1775832083"},{"product_id":"if-i-only-had-a-brain-t-shirt-scarecrow-woke-brain-broke","title":"Scarecrow Woke, Brain Broke","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the crows cackle louder than common sense and the straw men finally get called out, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eIf I Only Had a Brain T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a rainbow-haired, politically incorrect scarecrow roast that hits harder than a field full of reality checks.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIf I Only Had a Brain T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Say it with straw and zero fucks on the \u003cstrong\u003eIf I Only Had a Brain T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a gloriously unhinged scarecrow stands proud in a golden field at sunset, rainbow dreads flowing, denim overalls patched with “Antifa,” “I Love Abortions,” and “Liberals Rule” badges, whistle necklace swinging, one mittened hand raised like he’s about to drop the dumbest take of the century, while massive bold “IF I ONLY HAD A BRAIN” screams across the top and bottom like a tragic opera nobody asked for. This tee is for the shit-posters who live for the chaos, the ones who watch the circus burn and bring marshmallows, and anyone who wants to wear “I see through the bullshit” energy louder than a megaphone at a protest. Classic unisex fit, soft as a hay bale, and printed to last through every triggered reply and eye-roll chain.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the ones who laugh at the absurdity, the shit-stirrers who know the scarecrow’s been running the show too long, and anyone who wants their shirt to trigger snowflakes while staying cozy. Whether you’re at the range, the rally, the bar, or just owning the timeline from your couch, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning heads, sparking meltdowns, and reminding everyone that brains are optional when the vibes are this good.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eIf I Only Had a Brain T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let the rainbow straw man do the talking—because sometimes the dumbest costume is the one wearing the truth. 🌾🔥😈\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44635939766317,"sku":"71322030003118870344","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44635939799085,"sku":"22652964018694160198","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44635939831853,"sku":"12627940059751334362","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44635939864621,"sku":"11240735469429847850","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635939897389,"sku":"30667975464161375647","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635939930157,"sku":"16752342973555959101","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/1011873463333117850_2048.jpg?v=1775831792"},{"product_id":"spiritual-growth-t-shirt-from-shadow-to-shine-branches-to-crown","title":"From Shadow to Shine, Branches to Crown","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the branches stretch toward the unseen and the roots keep every secret buried deep, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eSpiritual Growth T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a sacred, shadowed reminder that real elevation happens when the old you gets pruned away.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSpiritual Growth T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Rise higher with the \u003cstrong\u003eSpiritual Growth T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a haunting Tree of Life spreads its ancient branches across your chest, roots twisting into the unknown below while the canopy glows with subtle, ethereal light, a bold pentagram pulsing right in the middle of the branches like the beating heart of every true awakening. Above it all, elegant shadowed script declares “Spiritual Growth,” quiet but commanding. This tee is for the seekers who walk the crooked path, the witches who meditate at 3 a.m., the ones who know real evolution hurts, burns, and looks damn good doing it—perfect for late-night rituals, forest wanders, or just flexing that “I’ve been through some shit and came out glowing” energy louder than a full moon howl.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the shadow workers who grow in the dark, the occult curious who know the pentagram ain’t evil—it’s just math with attitude, and anyone who wants their shirt to whisper “I’m evolving, bitch” without saying a word. Whether you’re grounding in the dirt, meditating under real stars, or just carrying that quiet power through the daily grind, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning heads, sparking questions, and reminding the world that real growth always starts underground.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eSpiritual Growth T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let the tree do the talking—because some awakenings look better in black and glow. 🌳🖤✨\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44635950546989,"sku":"21193124079943312904","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44635950579757,"sku":"22266900814388181233","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44635950612525,"sku":"13523889973450974597","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44635950645293,"sku":"27822619400796046049","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44635950678061,"sku":"63018211591859064771","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44635950710829,"sku":"54293541352349086260","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44635950743597,"sku":"28417313493276565564","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44635950776365,"sku":"10886163540199582989","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44635950809133,"sku":"18043930857225940540","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44635950841901,"sku":"45122399661414409841","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44635950874669,"sku":"24398430048290497193","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44635950907437,"sku":"15101879098016471548","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44635950940205,"sku":"12083047698797576405","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44635950972973,"sku":"31372583827784060242","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44635951005741,"sku":"18395579664316969269","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44635951038509,"sku":"30836632863746023661","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635951071277,"sku":"17303191032473312295","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635951104045,"sku":"26579290394194280153","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635951136813,"sku":"74446708526168353079","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635951169581,"sku":"18872965751399591426","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635951202349,"sku":"28521324866853073663","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635951235117,"sku":"23938730494901268446","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635951267885,"sku":"84886875166672148918","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635951300653,"sku":"24689884936090639836","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/3765616391242676380_2048.jpg?v=1775831361"},{"product_id":"get-lost-t-shirt-stars-spinnin-trail-fadin-you-vanishin","title":"Stars Spinnin’, Trail Fadin’, You Vanishin’","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the trail disappears and the soul says “fuck it, I’m stayin’,” High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eGet Lost T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a swirling, star-drenched mountain masterpiece that dares you to vanish and never come back the same.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eGet Lost T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Disappear into the wild with the \u003cstrong\u003eGet Lost T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a majestic mountain range rises sharp and jagged against a blazing orange-to-deep-blue sunset sky, swirling Van Gogh-style stars exploding overhead in electric blues and glowing yellows while dense pine forests blanket the lower slopes, all crowned by massive, unapologetic “GET LOST” text that hits like a dare carved into the night itself. This tee is for the wanderers who burn the map, the ones who chase horizons instead of happiness, and anyone who wants to wear “I’m not lost, I’m exactly where I wanna be” energy louder than a coyote howl at midnight. Classic unisex fit, soft as a campfire blanket, and printed to last through every off-grid mile and “where the hell am I?” story.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the trailblazers who disappear on purpose, the ones who trade WiFi for wilderness, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “I’m not lost, I’m free.” Whether you’re deep in the backcountry, road-trippin’ till the tank’s dry, or just dreamin’ of the next escape from the couch, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ every day into an open invitation to vanish.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eGet Lost T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let the mountains call—because sometimes the best way home is forgettin’ where home is. 🏔️🌅✨\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44635966570541,"sku":"56193149790576733936","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44635966603309,"sku":"86731076148886557125","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44635966636077,"sku":"10311181787628814923","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44635966668845,"sku":"51661120110877591743","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635966701613,"sku":"26453397431784546690","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635966734381,"sku":"10384391135901977352","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/6951561859792625543_2048.jpg?v=1775832198"},{"product_id":"degenerating-social-structures-t-shirt-five-caps-zero-fucks-full-collapse","title":"Five Caps, Zero Fucks, Full Collapse","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the mushrooms got personality and the whole damn system’s startin’ to look a little wobbly, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eDegenerating Social Structures T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a rowdy, trippy little uprising that lets five colorful fungal weirdos do the mocking while society quietly melts in the background.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDegenerating Social Structures T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Let the fungi take the piss with the \u003cstrong\u003eDegenerating Social Structures T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—five sassy, googly-eyed mushrooms line up like they’re auditioning for the end of civilization: a droopy blue one, a smug teal blob, a chill green cap, a derpy red pizza-slice freak, and a tiny orange gremlin with a death stare, all perched on stems while massive, dripping pink “DEGENERATING SOCIAL STRUCTURES” blazes below like graffiti from the mycelium resistance. This tee is for the degenerates who watch empires rot with a grin, the psychonauts who know the real power grows underground, and anyone who wants to wear “let it all collapse, I brought snacks” energy louder than a spore cloud at a funeral. Classic unisex fit, soft as fresh moss, and printed to last through every late-night rant and “told you so” moment.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the chaos agents who see beauty in the breakdown, the mushroom mystics who know fungi always win in the end, and anyone who wants their shirt to look like the last broadcast from a crumbling civilization. Whether you’re vibin’ at the bonfire, scrolling through the end times, or just owning the day with zero fucks left for the status quo, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ stares, and remindin’ the world that when the old structures degenerate, the real party finally begins.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eDegenerating Social Structures T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let the mushrooms do the mocking—because some collapses look better in cartoon form. 🍄🌑😈\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44635971452973,"sku":"72921784087319184546","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44635971485741,"sku":"97361201411464962189","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Soft Pink \/ S","offer_id":44820226605101,"sku":"36082486977305602128","price":20.16,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44635971518509,"sku":"78765860043357199356","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44635971551277,"sku":"14892254142281080313","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44635971584045,"sku":"19443837308096318172","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Soft Pink \/ M","offer_id":44820226637869,"sku":"21479658666154377213","price":20.16,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44635971616813,"sku":"25722981390729461221","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44635971649581,"sku":"29245394708270934891","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44635971682349,"sku":"14259831832480436269","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Soft Pink \/ L","offer_id":44820226670637,"sku":"33612060587062851488","price":20.16,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44635971715117,"sku":"48854952403604897162","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44635971747885,"sku":"59699811328153570995","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44635971780653,"sku":"11866035998890195971","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Soft Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44820226703405,"sku":"25192458023869518696","price":20.16,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44635971813421,"sku":"86535265316336860338","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635971846189,"sku":"12015722641278614624","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635971878957,"sku":"18242908528947723609","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Soft Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44820226736173,"sku":"78645813223952774090","price":23.54,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44635971911725,"sku":"16771382309932080312","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635971944493,"sku":"55002845423944949296","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635971977261,"sku":"20361671225249542007","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Soft Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44820226768941,"sku":"43519897485330084762","price":27.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44635972010029,"sku":"32065356001139684372","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/15127601035474758504_2048.jpg?v=1775832234"},{"product_id":"the-real-white-devil-we-all-chase","title":"The Real White Devil We All Chase","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the highs come sweeter than a midnight binge and the crashes hit harder than a bad habit, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eSugar T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a cheeky, nose-twitchin’ flex that slaps you with the truth: sugar's as addictive as cocaine, and twice as legal to wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSugar T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e What we’re sayin’ here is sugar is as addictive as cocaine, and this tee spells it out without the bump—bold, glitchy “Sugar” drippin’ in electric pink-cyan glow above a rolled bill loaded next to fat, crystalline lines of pure white powder, razor blade glintin’ like it’s winkin’ at your sweet tooth. This shirt’s for the sugar fiends who know the rush ain’t just in the bag, the ones who crash from cupcakes harder than a weekend warrior, and anyone ready to flex that “my vice is socially acceptable” energy louder than a candy wrapper in church. Classic unisex fit, soft as powdered temptation, and printed to last through every crave, crash, and “just one more” lie.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the sweet-tooth degenerates who know a donut hits like a line, the crash survivors who laugh at the shakes, and anyone who wants their shirt to whisper “sugar’s my coke, what’s yours?” without sayin’ a word. Whether you’re pre-gamin’ with candy, vibin’ at the afters, or just flexin’ that addictive soul from the couch, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ knowing nods, and remindin’ the world that the sweetest highs come in grams or bags—your choice.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the \u003cstrong\u003eSugar T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e and let the lines do the talkin’—because sugar’s the real white devil, and it’s got us all hooked. ❄️🍬✨\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44650962190381,"sku":"24084134262417574114","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44650962223149,"sku":"32582144425549351235","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44650962255917,"sku":"22618361455443604046","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44650962288685,"sku":"17984361235224140531","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44650962321453,"sku":"47792997844525657106","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44650962354221,"sku":"24882195449475897953","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44650962386989,"sku":"22874095413918644800","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44650962419757,"sku":"10743561143361047536","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44650962452525,"sku":"54052861936001931816","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44650962485293,"sku":"14329146438906400139","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44650962518061,"sku":"49386326182667162405","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44650962550829,"sku":"31641265595640838488","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44650962583597,"sku":"11490073949603036157","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44650962616365,"sku":"19749665513946082498","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44650962649133,"sku":"16554713123102927104","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44650962681901,"sku":"33783649477817230243","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44650962714669,"sku":"53526645357247036055","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44650962747437,"sku":"79955646703690922081","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/15511850491840732723_2048.jpg?v=1775843713"},{"product_id":"zen-motherfucker","title":"Zen Motherfucker","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the old calm got flipped the bird and enlightenment decided to show its middle finger, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eFuck Enlightenment T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a glowing, unapologetic Buddha giving the universe the finger while radiating pure “I’ve seen the void and it can suck it” energy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFuck Enlightenment T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Sit your ass down and flip off serenity with the Fuck Enlightenment T-Shirt—a savage, orange-flamed Buddha silhouette locked in lotus, eyes closed in mock bliss, one hand raised in the universal “fuck you” gesture while the other rests like it’s daring the cosmos to do something about it. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee wraps pure spiritual rebellion in buttery-soft comfort, perfect for meditation sessions that end in profanity, yoga classes where you’re the problem, or just remindin’ every fake guru and self-help scammer that some awakenings come with a side of “go fuck yourself.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Made for the ones who’ve chased nirvana long enough to realize it’s overrated, the ones who meditate just to get pissed off clearer, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “I’ve found inner peace and it told me to fuck off” without sayin’ a word. Whether you’re sittin’ in silence thinkin’ dark thoughts, flowin’ through yoga while mentally roastin’ everyone, or just ownin’ the day with enlightened contempt, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ “what the hell?” stares, and remindin’ the world that some Buddhas don’t bless—they burn.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Fuck Enlightenment T-Shirt and let your middle-finger awakening shine—because peace is overrated, and fuckery is eternal.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44651530944557,"sku":"46246089669052703395","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44651530977325,"sku":"88489338980494889798","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44651531010093,"sku":"30999961855375533850","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44825180897325,"sku":"83393886229333129983","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44651531042861,"sku":"28093661172688310078","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44651531075629,"sku":"16028223945331995642","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44651531108397,"sku":"20758803158775116631","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44825180930093,"sku":"25755719270467381552","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44651531141165,"sku":"33363772056835927833","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44651531173933,"sku":"20407388702021070457","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44651531206701,"sku":"68564762951857094787","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44825180962861,"sku":"42565429379476831850","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44651531239469,"sku":"87168074049385358338","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44651531272237,"sku":"22909318005470781207","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44651531305005,"sku":"12349184219218002616","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44825180995629,"sku":"13390084011822853728","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651531337773,"sku":"17012914788463535745","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651531370541,"sku":"30319372480615001875","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651531403309,"sku":"33254361551593333522","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825181028397,"sku":"17335106383313460062","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651531436077,"sku":"16175910311452680019","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651531468845,"sku":"25238622766319102981","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651531501613,"sku":"12337869362414101016","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825181061165,"sku":"64087120889947013255","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/grok-image-0e5296f2-97f5-4d20-9b08-9f165cbd38e0.jpg?v=1780397395"},{"product_id":"kundalini-rising-one-rep-at-a-time","title":"Kundalini Rising One Rep at a Time","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the chakras get crushed under heavy iron and enlightenment comes from grindin’ plates instead of sittin’ still, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003eChakra Gains T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a vertical stack of pure, unapologetic bro-spirit that turns every energy center into a goddamn PR machine.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eChakra Gains T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Align your chakras and destroy your previous max with the Chakra Gains T-Shirt—a savage vertical tower of jacked dudes hittin’ every lift in the book, each one perched on a glowing lotus that says your root chakra’s grounded in deadlifts, your solar plexus is powered by bench, and your crown’s just the pump after a killer set. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee fuses gym-rat supremacy with psychedelic swagger, perfect for walkin’ into the weight room like you own every chakra and every barbell in it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Tailored for the lifters who know spiritual growth comes from progressive overload, the ones who meditate on the squat rack and find nirvana in the burn, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “my chakras are jacked and yours are still sittin’ lotus-style” without sayin’ a word. Whether you’re reppin’ out in the gym, flexin’ post-pump, or just ownin’ the day with zero fucks left for weak energy, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ envy, and remindin’ the world that some awakenings are measured in plates, not lotus petals.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Chakra Gains T-Shirt and let your aligned, iron-forged aura shine—because real enlightenment leaves stretch marks on the soul. 💪🧘‍♂️🔥\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44651549655085,"sku":"71208416239639879924","price":34.12,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44651549687853,"sku":"16215750630888544406","price":29.61,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44651549720621,"sku":"13226711679561937442","price":34.12,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44651549753389,"sku":"29339236586418826656","price":34.12,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44651549786157,"sku":"26548331309288918682","price":29.61,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44651549818925,"sku":"19457336226578874980","price":34.12,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44651549851693,"sku":"15726398474058886206","price":34.12,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44651549884461,"sku":"10316374526772744443","price":29.61,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44651549917229,"sku":"22123017873092252206","price":34.12,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44651549949997,"sku":"28104667840243300433","price":34.12,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44651549982765,"sku":"22317576238275092068","price":29.61,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44651550015533,"sku":"74084450332717067073","price":34.12,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651550048301,"sku":"17051975771191570188","price":36.94,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651550081069,"sku":"22844367869366518054","price":32.57,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651550113837,"sku":"12839806208854753410","price":36.94,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651550146605,"sku":"14308811407288078730","price":39.84,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651550179373,"sku":"20383160381112239879","price":35.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651550212141,"sku":"12048735133949128435","price":39.84,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/7146966568860691684_2048.jpg?v=1775832713"},{"product_id":"graceful-decay-cosmic-glow","title":"Graceful Decay, Cosmic Glow","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the cosmos folds into fungi and the whole damn universe starts lookin’ a little too graceful on its way down, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003eDegenerating Gracefully T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a purple-capped, galaxy-swirled middle finger to every system that thinks it’s gonna last forever.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDegenerating Gracefully T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Embrace the beautiful rot with the Degenerating Gracefully T-Shirt—a single majestic purple mushroom floats against a swirling, star-drenched galaxy backdrop, cap glowing like it’s the last light in a dying cosmos, while “Degenerating Gracefully” drips in elegant, unapologetic script below like a cosmic obituary written in spore ink. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee wraps pure psychedelic surrender in buttery-soft comfort, perfect for late-night stares into the void, post-blaze philosophy sessions, or just remindin’ the world that everything falls apart eventually—and some of us look damn good doin’ it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Tailored for the ones who’ve seen the collapse coming and decided to wear it like couture, the psychonauts who know degeneration is just another word for transformation, and anyone who wants their shirt to whisper “it’s all fallin’ apart beautifully” without sayin’ a word. Whether you’re deep in the forest trippin’ on the real thing, scrollin’ through the end times, or just ownin’ the day with zero fucks left for permanence, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ quiet nods, and remindin’ the world that graceful endings always start with a good glow.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Degenerating Gracefully T-Shirt and let the decay look damn elegant—because when everything falls apart, the real ones do it with style. 🍄🌌🖤\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44651605000237,"sku":"30807624139019181081","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44651605033005,"sku":"25697436042161657676","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44651605065773,"sku":"94510970645413434091","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44651605098541,"sku":"67949002696199109823","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651605131309,"sku":"31729536531904011151","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651605164077,"sku":"21198174533767784295","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/17793562357218462821_2048.jpg?v=1775842174"},{"product_id":"bound-by-choice-sealed-by-fire","title":"Bound by Choice, Sealed by Fire","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the night sky melts into mescaline dreams and forever feels like one long, unbreakable grip, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eEternally Bound T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a raw, glowing testament to love that doesn’t ask permission to last.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEternally Bound T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Lock it in forever with the Eternally Bound T-Shirt—a fierce couple clasps hands against a swirling, psychedelic mescaline-drenched backdrop of electric trails, blooming fractals, and endless cosmic fire. Bold script declares “Eternally Bound” like a vow carved into the fabric of reality itself. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee fuses primal commitment with mind-bending visuals, perfect for soul-tied lovers who know real bonds don’t fade—they just get trippier with time.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the couples who’ve been through the fire and came out fused tighter than ever, the ones who know love isn’t soft whispers—it’s grip-hard, stare-down-the-void, “we’re in this shit together” energy. Whether you’re road-trippin’ under real stars, tripping together in silence, or just wearin’ your forever like armor, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ “damn they’re solid” stares, and remindin’ the world that some bonds don’t break—they just keep trippin’ deeper.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Eternally Bound T-Shirt and let your unbreakable grip show—because real love doesn’t fade… it just gets more psychedelic.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44651612536877,"sku":"20662657000013812218","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44651612569645,"sku":"28417124847270808847","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44651612602413,"sku":"92174678819473028822","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44651612635181,"sku":"33586522972293201433","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44651612667949,"sku":"29508706118922139819","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44651612700717,"sku":"20674669319876496031","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44651612733485,"sku":"22116709472675330793","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44651612766253,"sku":"31481444542296427994","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44651612799021,"sku":"14613954340112131632","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44651612831789,"sku":"63265408110361678703","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44651612864557,"sku":"16189789058651106909","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44651612897325,"sku":"19379674610659678108","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651612930093,"sku":"14639810717130910166","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651612962861,"sku":"77974485640846887739","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651612995629,"sku":"81136806791997660852","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651613028397,"sku":"23082736591533697050","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651613061165,"sku":"17678534908430501489","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651613093933,"sku":"10732158536982183705","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/grok-image-08a023c8-b01d-4fc4-b2c7-cbdae6fb2669.jpg?v=1780331689"},{"product_id":"gobblin-like-it-s-thanksgiving","title":"Gobblin’ Like It’s Thanksgiving","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the nights get filthy and the only thing thicker than the air is the tension before the drop, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003eCock Gobblin’ T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a shameless, throat-deep declaration that says “yeah I do, and yeah I’m fuckin’ good at it.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCock Gobblin’ T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Own the art with the Cock Gobblin’ T-Shirt—a bold, no-regrets tee that celebrates the wet, relentless, gag-reflex-ignorin’ pursuit of pleasure. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee wraps pure, unfiltered oral worship in buttery-soft comfort, perfect for post-glory flexin’, bar confessions where everyone pretends they’ve never been there, or just remindin’ the world that some mouths were made for more than talkin’.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is ideal for steamy sessions, hungover brunches, or layering with a filthy grin. Fabric blends include: Ash and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal sin, featuring a classic crew neckline that pairs seamlessly with whatever (or whoever) you’re wearin’ tonight. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders ensure a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams maintain shape through every deep-throat laugh.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP, this tee matches your degenerate oral obsession with real-deal values.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation, lettin’ you rock the \"Cock Gobblin’\" energy with zero itch and maximum shameless swagger.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Tailored for the throat queens \u0026amp; kings who’ve turned “deep throat” into an art form, the ones who swallow pride along with everything else, and anyone who wants their shirt to scream “I gobble cock like it’s my job—and I’m employee of the month” without openin’ their mouth (because it’s probably still full). Whether you’re relivin’ the glory at the bar, flexin’ at brunch, or just ownin’ the day with zero fucks left for vanilla, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ knowing grins, and remindin’ the world that some skills are measured in inches, not words.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Cock Gobblin’ T-Shirt and let your throat legend status shine—because real ones don’t just talk about it… they prove it. 😈🍆💦\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44651615289389,"sku":"19254980246661981329","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44651615322157,"sku":"19559546872477537223","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44651615354925,"sku":"69193977927372004604","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44825167364141,"sku":"62170784198761051237","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44651615387693,"sku":"21464846360652340748","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44651615420461,"sku":"27855271801377187317","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44651615453229,"sku":"76163330353782370876","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44825167396909,"sku":"95055477240855556904","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44651615485997,"sku":"12342090934278219407","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44651615518765,"sku":"22863769171612944184","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44651615551533,"sku":"75389086555063025935","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44825167429677,"sku":"18541697445722963714","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44651615584301,"sku":"13424644198633764795","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44651615617069,"sku":"33769646678318757843","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44651615649837,"sku":"15254502235777458572","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44825167462445,"sku":"60466736999973947803","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651615682605,"sku":"28332642708005340752","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651615715373,"sku":"18760030207076727938","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651615748141,"sku":"12219088336824236983","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825167495213,"sku":"21245113059353705767","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651615780909,"sku":"90944800144654852706","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651615813677,"sku":"18308793598706851012","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651615846445,"sku":"10180553434369059598","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825167527981,"sku":"76734729289584488472","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/3859175581208956414_2048.jpg?v=1775842184"},{"product_id":"visions-over-violence-but-we-still-pack-heat","title":"Visions Over Violence, But We Still Pack Heat","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the molecules whisper secrets louder than any preacher and the trip don’t need permission to take you, High in the Pines drops the \u003cstrong\u003eMescaline Molecule T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a clean, clinical flex that says “this is the real sacrament, no bullshit, no filler, just pure cactus alchemy printed on cotton.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eMescaline Molecule T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Wear the blueprint of enlightenment with the Mescaline Molecule T-Shirt—a stark, glowing diagram of the mescaline structure floating against black like it’s the only law that matters. No cartoon cactus, no hippie flowers—just cold, hard molecular truth that says “I know what I’m putting in my body, and I’m not asking for approval.” This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee blends scientific precision with savage intent, perfect for chemistry nerds who trip, psychonauts who respect the molecule, or anyone who wants to flex that “my sacrament has a CAS number” energy louder than a sermon on Sunday.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Made for the ones who treat the molecule like scripture, the ones who respect the cactus enough to know its exact structure, and anyone who wants their shirt to quietly scream “I don’t do faith, I do chemistry” without sayin’ a word. Whether you’re deep in ceremony, scrollin’ through research papers, or just ownin’ the day with zero tolerance for placebo bullshit, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ knowing nods, and remindin’ the world that some sacraments come with a molecular weight.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Mescaline Molecule T-Shirt and let the structure speak—because real enlightenment has a formula, and it’s not written in a book. 🌵🧬🔥\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Pink \/ S","offer_id":44651624792109,"sku":"81616167974691663790","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":44651624824877,"sku":"12609121776698064505","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44651624857645,"sku":"53732457565177748450","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ S","offer_id":44651624890413,"sku":"10056394746507700885","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ M","offer_id":44651624923181,"sku":"31156218552481061325","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":44651624955949,"sku":"29863069410798549488","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44651624988717,"sku":"25283787124767374092","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ M","offer_id":44651625021485,"sku":"16980842438876278355","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ L","offer_id":44651625054253,"sku":"18167963601526656637","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":44651625087021,"sku":"75588450544451115186","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44651625119789,"sku":"28767578685435337489","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ L","offer_id":44651625152557,"sku":"27387442449756806155","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44651625185325,"sku":"17275912670023412498","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":44651625218093,"sku":"20767353701107545653","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44651625250861,"sku":"10224384325244266627","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ XL","offer_id":44651625283629,"sku":"26579375640708441040","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651625316397,"sku":"27642645255862307316","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651625349165,"sku":"16553204281638851962","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651625381933,"sku":"15635838003214197319","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651625414701,"sku":"93439037711321369841","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651625447469,"sku":"33988801844475269705","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651625480237,"sku":"28681353196542219185","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651625513005,"sku":"30638794244782576680","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Charity Pink \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651625545773,"sku":"36455547369226029146","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/6422802805140975157_2048.jpg?v=1775832432"},{"product_id":"network-stronger-than-your-bloodline","title":"Network Stronger Than Your Bloodline","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the mycelium runs deeper than blood and the mushrooms laugh at the crumbling world above, High in the Pines unleashes the \u003cstrong\u003eMycelium Mafia T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e—a raw, spore-dusted middle finger to every system that thinks it’s gonna last forever.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eMycelium Mafia T-Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e Join the underground family with the Mycelium Mafia T-Shirt—a glowing cluster of mushrooms rising like a cartel from the dark soil, caps flared in electric blues and teals, roots twisting into the void while “Mycelium Mafia” drips in bold, fungal script below like a vow carved into the network itself. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee fuses psychedelic menace with buttery-soft comfort, perfect for late-night ceremonies, post-trip philosophy, or just remindin’ the world that when empires rot, the real power grows beneath the surface—and we’re already everywhere.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e The Bella Canvas 3001 is a classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee that fits like a well-loved favorite. Soft cotton and quality print make users fall in love with it over and over again. These t-shirts have ribbed knit collars to bolster shaping. The shoulders are tapered for a better fit over time, and dual side seams hold the garment's shape for longer. Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, the Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²)) that's breathable and easy to layer. Perfect for active and leisure wear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric Blends\u003c\/strong\u003e Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Tailored for the ones who’ve stared into the network long enough to get stared back at, the psychonauts who know fungi always win in the end, and anyone who wants their shirt to whisper “we don’t do forgiveness, we do forever” without sayin’ a word. Whether you’re deep in the forest trippin’ on the real thing, scrollin’ through the end times, or just ownin’ the day with zero fucks left for permanence, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turnin’ heads, sparklin’ quiet nods, and remindin’ the world that some families don’t recruit—they initiate.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space-collapse: preserve;\"\u003eWear the Mycelium Mafia T-Shirt and let your fungal allegiance shine—because when the structures degenerate, the mycelium rises… and we’re already everywhere.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":44651627151405,"sku":"20306751656169901895","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":44651627184173,"sku":"76307806156574137623","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":44651627249709,"sku":"29361684521041580741","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":44825161302061,"sku":"18137798847432271738","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":44651627282477,"sku":"16568625913737424835","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":44651627315245,"sku":"16134803205045425645","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":44651627380781,"sku":"49164077653341054842","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":44825161334829,"sku":"28657422511686454454","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":44651627413549,"sku":"26991507852474398494","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":44651627446317,"sku":"29074553212522094862","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":44651627511853,"sku":"18859945011277729298","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":44825161367597,"sku":"10816061584574043155","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":44651627544621,"sku":"14777342929469006511","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":44651627577389,"sku":"16422427039561551048","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":44651627642925,"sku":"12754665764585821623","price":22.33,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":44825161400365,"sku":"12576903765115633281","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651627675693,"sku":"12097189389094321390","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651627708461,"sku":"36255899258186122877","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":44651627773997,"sku":"16182848697064557686","price":25.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":44825161433133,"sku":"19297584701005090477","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651627806765,"sku":"11474594336693063868","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651627839533,"sku":"32702874715177239300","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":44651627905069,"sku":"32445939585260441774","price":28.06,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":44825161465901,"sku":"10384240347987214733","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/10196422713000467848_2048.jpg?v=1775840506"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/collections\/12423750990521464325_2048.jpg?v=1780400710","url":"https:\/\/highinthepines.com\/collections\/high-five-line.oembed?page=5","provider":"high in the pines","version":"1.0","type":"link"}