{"title":"Seasonal Disgrace","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003eMeta title: Seasonal Disgrace | Dirty Holiday Graphic Tees\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\"\u003eMeta: Seasonal Disgrace collects the filthy holiday shirts — slasher jokes, cock-gobblin’ Thanksgiving, and Krampus Christmas. Wear the disgrace. Shop High in the Pines.\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"krismas-comes-for-the-wicked","title":"Krismas Comes for the Wicked","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where Christmas is a cover story and Krismas is collection night — the bells ain’t cheerful, the sack ain’t toys, and the nice list is just paperwork for people who never met the other guy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eKrismas Comes for the Wicked\u003c\/strong\u003e Santa sells the dream. Krampus runs the books. All year the wicked hide behind cookies, carols, and that tired lie that coal is as bad as it gets. Then the night drops, the switches come out, and the ones who had it coming find out the other list was never a joke. He doesn’t knock. He doesn’t leave a note. He takes what the year earned and walks it into the dark while the rest of the house pretends the tree still means mercy. This shirt is for the ones who always rooted for the collector.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, this Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight 4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²) fabric that stays easy while the story on it stays ugly. Ash and Heather Prism colors run 99% cotton, 1% polyester; Heather and Solid Blend colors hit 52% cotton, 48% polyester; Athletic Heather and Black Heather come in at 90% cotton, 10% polyester. Soft cotton. Hard holiday.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Retail fit for the bar, the party, and the dinner that goes quiet when you sit down. Ribbed knit collar. Tapered shoulders. Dual side seams that hold shape. Classic crew neck, short sleeve, unisex cut — clean enough to wear anywhere you’re willing to start shit.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas. US and international. Humane. No-sweat-shop. Sustainable. Fair Labor Association. Platinum WRAP. The folklore’s savage. The factory isn’t.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e Tear-away label. No itch stealing the scene. Sleeve prints and neck labels use DTF when fulfilled by OPT OnDemand and Shirt Monkey.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e You’re the one who never bought the Santa sermon. Folklore sicko. Holiday heretic. The person who hears “merry Christmas” and wonders who didn’t make it to morning.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eWear the Krismas Comes for the Wicked and stop pretending coal was the punishment.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":67543393206317,"sku":"30429307225432501914","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":67543393239085,"sku":"20271078782683029166","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":67543393271853,"sku":"63080818909274510906","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":67543393304621,"sku":"11873732533119533885","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":67543393337389,"sku":"28941227696476678387","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":67543393370157,"sku":"23804296381060598567","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":67543393402925,"sku":"14747752234945772100","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":67543393435693,"sku":"29990121479400392099","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":67543393468461,"sku":"32591585630639251582","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":67543393501229,"sku":"38225479996482934572","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":67543393533997,"sku":"23054541596344293962","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":67543393566765,"sku":"66272848837268876461","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/grok-image-b3166575-1152-4742-a45f-09b328a67aa6.jpg?v=1789750593"},{"product_id":"unisex-jersey-short-sleeve-tee","title":"Stuff the Bird","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the bird gets stuffed, the mouths get busy, and “gobble” never meant what grandma thought it meant.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eStuff the Bird\u003c\/strong\u003e Sit down. Shut up. Open wide. Thanksgiving just turned into a cock-gobblin’ contact sport and the blessing ain’t surviving the first course. You didn’t come to hold hands and whisper thanks. You came to wreck the table, make the room choke on the joke, and watch polite people pretend they can’t read. Give thanks. Gobble hard. This shirt is for the filthy animal at dinner who came hungry and left nobody innocent.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, this Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight 4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²) fabric that stays soft while you stay disgusting. Ash and Heather Prism colors run 99% cotton, 1% polyester; Heather and Solid Blend colors hit 52% cotton, 48% polyester; Athletic Heather and Black Heather come in at 90% cotton, 10% polyester. Buttery cotton. Zero shame.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Retail fit that sits right while you ruin the holiday. Ribbed knit collar. Tapered shoulders. Dual side seams that hold shape after the feast and the fallout. Classic crew neck, short sleeve, unisex cut — clean tee, filthy mouth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas. US and international. Humane. No-sweat-shop. Sustainable. Fair Labor Association. Platinum WRAP certified. The shirt’s a problem. The factory isn’t.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e Tear-away label so nothing itches but the relatives. Sleeve prints and neck labels use DTF when fulfilled by OPT OnDemand and Shirt Monkey.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e You’re the reason the kids’ table keeps looking over. Dirty-joke cousin. Dinner-table weapon. The one who hears “let us pray” and already picked a worse use for a mouth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eWear the Stuff the Bird and gobble like you mean it.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":67543454351405,"sku":"24152408130507264813","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":67543454384173,"sku":"72015038027383004003","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":67543454416941,"sku":"25625484384439040333","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":67543454449709,"sku":"83721289209024767328","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":67543454482477,"sku":"50366079554794301006","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":67543454515245,"sku":"51281154962361924984","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/cock_gobblin.jpg?v=1789749870"},{"product_id":"i-bury-it-deep","title":"I Bury it Deep","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where Halloween ain’t candy — it’s a shovel, a hard-on, and something going so deep it don’t see daylight again.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eI Bury It Deep\u003c\/strong\u003e Forget the cute costume. You’re here to put it in the dirt and keep pumping till the hole’s a rumor. Mask on. Briefs strained. Shovel in one hand like the other job already finished and this one’s just the encore. They can call it a slasher bit. You know damn well it’s a stroke count. You don’t tease it. You don’t leave it shallow. You bury it to the hilt and let the ground take the secret. This shirt is for the freak who treats “deeper” like a threat and a compliment.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, this Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight 4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²) fabric that stays soft while you stay nasty. Ash and Heather Prism colors run 99% cotton, 1% polyester; Heather and Solid Blend colors hit 52% cotton, 48% polyester; Athletic Heather and Black Heather come in at 90% cotton, 10% polyester. Easy to wear. Hard to hide.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Retail fit that sits tight enough to look guilty. Ribbed knit collar. Tapered shoulders. Dual side seams that hold shape after a long, filthy night. Classic crew neck, short sleeve, unisex cut — church-clean cut, grave-dirty mouth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas. US and international. Humane. No-sweat-shop. Sustainable. Fair Labor Association. Platinum WRAP certified. The joke’s indecent. The factory isn’t.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e Tear-away label so the only thing rubbing people wrong is the print. Sleeve prints and neck labels use DTF when fulfilled by OPT OnDemand and Shirt Monkey.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e You’re the one who hears “bury it” and starts unbuckling. Horror slut. Dirt freak. The problem at the Halloween party who came to finish a job, not bob for apples.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eWear the I Bury It Deep and put it so far down they feel it in their throat.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":67543947411501,"sku":"30089172474902350403","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":67543947444269,"sku":"29066592062069870479","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":67543947477037,"sku":"28047392427624555427","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":67543947509805,"sku":"19778831664026341729","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":67543947542573,"sku":"26475619509502934980","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":67543947575341,"sku":"24428690718985789108","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":67543947608109,"sku":"11643901736937986944","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":67543947640877,"sku":"30342693668403679600","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":67543947673645,"sku":"22733479359171178109","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":67543947706413,"sku":"15669833427403366026","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":67543947739181,"sku":"51947270714068650388","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":67543947771949,"sku":"20541338470563912225","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/deep.jpg?v=1789749606"},{"product_id":"i-raise-more-than-spirits","title":"I Raise More than Spirits","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eNestled in the wild, whisperin’ pines where the séance is just foreplay — candles lit, doll in her lap, and something standing in the room that ain’t a ghost.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eI Raise More Than Spirits\u003c\/strong\u003e She didn’t call you over to talk to grandma. The dead can wait. She’s here to lift what’s living, keep it up, and make the afterlife jealous. One hand on the ritual, the other on the real problem, and by the time the candles burn down nobody’s asking if that was a spirit or a pulse. Halloween’s the excuse. Getting it raised is the job. This shirt is for the witch who treats a haunting like a booty call and leaves both sides shaking.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, this Bella Canvas 3001 is a lightweight 4.2 oz\/yd² (142 g\/m²) fabric that stays soft while the joke stays indecent. Ash and Heather Prism colors run 99% cotton, 1% polyester; Heather and Solid Blend colors hit 52% cotton, 48% polyester; Athletic Heather and Black Heather come in at 90% cotton, 10% polyester. Easy to wear. Hard to explain to the church crowd.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Retail fit that sits right at the haunt, the bar, and whatever circle you’re about to desecrate. Ribbed knit collar. Tapered shoulders. Dual side seams that hold shape after a long, filthy night. Classic crew neck, short sleeve, unisex cut — clean tee, dirty conjuring.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Bella+Canvas. US and international. Humane. No-sweat-shop. Sustainable. Fair Labor Association. Platinum WRAP certified. The ritual’s nasty. The factory isn’t.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e Tear-away label so the only thing getting under your skin is the print. Sleeve prints and neck labels use DTF when fulfilled by OPT OnDemand and Shirt Monkey.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e You’re the one who hears “raise spirits” and already took it the wrong way on purpose. Halloween freak. Bedroom occultist. The problem in the circle who came to get something up, not put something to rest.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eWear the I Raise More Than Spirits and keep it standing till dawn\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":67543959044141,"sku":"86791185052625945223","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":67543959076909,"sku":"26678656352451590088","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":67543959109677,"sku":"14054058259138665471","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":67543959142445,"sku":"28577497997572842213","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":67543959175213,"sku":"27329450311659609431","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":67543959207981,"sku":"27230005032231194253","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":67543959240749,"sku":"23247982882243197317","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":67543959273517,"sku":"16381533021937764423","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":67543959306285,"sku":"23392701316062300857","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":67543959339053,"sku":"11096672960581990828","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":67543959371821,"sku":"47677517501382517707","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":67543959404589,"sku":"29914439809795993556","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/raising_the_dead.jpg?v=1789749476"}],"url":"https:\/\/highinthepines.com\/collections\/seasonal-disgrace.oembed","provider":"high in the pines","version":"1.0","type":"link"}