{"product_id":"bimtard","title":"BIMTARD","description":"\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eNestled in the high whispering pines where the BIMTARD can’t even fucking read the BIM, this tee is for every digital dipshit still treating it like a toddler’s shape sorter while giving the world’s most confident thumbs-up. This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee delivers pure rude attitude with the cozy comfort you need while you keep stuffing that cylinder in the wrong hole like the instructions are written in another language.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Comfort\u003c\/strong\u003e Crafted from 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (4.2 oz\/yd², 142 g\/m²), this lightweight, breathable fabric is perfect for late-night clash detections, job-site swagger, or layering while you rage-quit and pretend you know what the hell you’re doing. Fabric blends include:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eAsh and Heather Prism: 99% cotton, 1% polyester Heather and Solid Blend colors: 52% cotton, 48% polyester Athletic Heather and Black Heather: 90% cotton, 10% polyester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFlattering Fit\u003c\/strong\u003e Designed with a retail fit for both laid-back and semi-formal vibes, featuring a classic crew neckline that looks great under hard hats, coffee stains, or pure unfiltered frustration. Ribbed knit collars and tapered shoulders keep a sharp silhouette, while dual side seams hold up through every redesign meltdown and silent scream.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEthically Crafted\u003c\/strong\u003e Proudly produced by Bella+Canvas in the US and internationally, using humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable practices. Certified by the Fair Labor Association and Platinum WRAP — because even the biggest BIM illiterates deserve a shirt made with some damn standards.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSkin-Friendly Details\u003c\/strong\u003e A tear-away label eliminates irritation so nothing gets between you and full “BIMTARD” energy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBuilt for You\u003c\/strong\u003e Perfect for the legends who still can’t read the model or follow the fucking process, this soft, high-quality tee is your go-to for turning heads, sparking laughs, starting arguments, and saying “fuck it” louder than a chainsaw in the forest.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"auto\" style=\"white-space: pre-wrap;\"\u003eBrought to you from the Toolie Oscar, deep in the San Antonio river walk all the way to Witchita Falls, SON!!! Wear the BIMTARD T-Shirt and let your chaotic, illiterate modeling spirit howl.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":67199664095277,"sku":"13028117330812779239","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ S","offer_id":67199664128045,"sku":"21109738639353841963","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":67199664160813,"sku":"28606703496402950415","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ M","offer_id":67199664193581,"sku":"25735427034138491031","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":67199664226349,"sku":"90106446322062607685","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ L","offer_id":67199664259117,"sku":"17515169718672464906","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":67199664291885,"sku":"47356291045073397945","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ XL","offer_id":67199664324653,"sku":"81318531002062286096","price":25.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":67199664357421,"sku":"14497458589967326440","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 2XL","offer_id":67199664390189,"sku":"16157206438313792876","price":28.76,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":67199664422957,"sku":"12839129339575034920","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fuchsia \/ 3XL","offer_id":67199664455725,"sku":"50656299880258761655","price":31.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0698\/6327\/6589\/files\/3974292833195365876_2048.jpg?v=1785599758","url":"https:\/\/highinthepines.com\/products\/bimtard","provider":"high in the pines","version":"1.0","type":"link"}